


A Merciful Fate

by InkRanOut



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Gen, Light Angst, Loki (Marvel)'s Lips Sewn Shut, Loki Whump, Master/Slave, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mouth Sewn Shut, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slave Loki (Marvel), Slow Burn, Temporary Muteness, mild whump
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2019-07-04 00:02:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15829632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkRanOut/pseuds/InkRanOut
Summary: Thor makes a deal with Odin, and Loki finds himself serving one hundred years - a mortal's estimated lifespan - as Jane Foster's slave and test subject.Jane has every right to hold a grudge against the god, and so Loki expects to get nothing but pain during his time on Midgard.Then again, that wouldn't be the first time he has been wrong.





	1. A Deal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello people! Thank you for clicking on my work!
> 
> So, about this story. It started as an oneshot about Loki getting his lips sewed shut because I kind of liked the idea, so I ended up having some issues with the timeline.  
> It takes place sometime after Thor: The Dark World (because I've only watched up to that movie), but some stuff is different. For example, in my AU Loki has been arrested.
> 
> (Don't ask me what for, I'm sure he has a lot to be arrested for as it it. Something very bad, probably, because they freaking sewed his lips shut. I might talk about that later on, but I'm still not sure.)
> 
> Anyway, it doesn't really get in the way of the plot here, so try not to let it bother you!
> 
> (Sorry, I talk too much, I just had to make these things clear before we start.)
> 
> Sooo... Enjoy~

"You do it," Odin uttered, loud and clear, without a hint of hesitation.  
Thor's hands trembled, but he couldn't refuse. He took the needle.  
And Loki begged, he begged! Broken pleas, promises not meant to be kept, attempts to move his brother, they escaped his lying lips one after the other.  
Until he could beg no more.

The taste of blood was overwhelming as it flooded the god's mouth, rolling down his chin and dirtying his already damaged, once formal attire.

After it was done, the hand forcing him to face up was removed, and he immediately lowered his head in shame.  
Pain. Defeat. Betrayal.  
He knew he's not allowed to feel that last one. But it couldn't be helped.

Thor, who called himself his brother, sewed his lips with his very hands.  
And as he did that, his expression betrayed pain, that's true, but Loki still couldn't forgive it.  
And he knew that there was nothing to forgive. He knew that he failed and he had to be punished for it.

But Thor had showed him warmth. He had made a forgotten, useless part of him feel loved. And Loki hated to admit it, but it felt good. It felt great.  
Too great to last.  
He should've known.

And despite that, he still clinged to it, that fragile drop of light, the love Thor offered him so foolishly. It helped him get this far, it allowed him to maintain his composure during the trial and all the useless formalities after.  
But now it was all gone.

How was he supposed to accept the rest of his punishment like this? He had nothing to hold onto. Even Thor had a limit to how much he was willing to forgive.  
Even Thor had given up on him.

Hands chained, ankles in shackles, voice locked away.  
And his magic, that too had been bound by spells stronger than his.  
He was utterly powerless. There was no escape this time.

He blinked. It hurt, his lips hurt.  
Thor's tears were hot on his face, but he couldn't wipe them with the chains on. He only stared, wishing something would happen.  
If only the building suddenly collapsed. If one of those huge pillars broke.  
An invasion, a fire, anything that would get all those pairs of eyes off him.

But there would be no such a sweet way out this time.  
All that was left, was for Odin to finish up with whatever else he wanted to say.  
The act was over. Just as ordered, Thor had ruined his lips and his heart together with them. Wasn't that all?

Loki didn't even know his sentence. But he assumed it was the same as last time, life in prison.  
All Odin had to do was declare it. And then his fate would have been sealed.

"Father, wait. Before you decide my brother's fate, please listen to my request."

Odin raised an eyebrow, not the least bit surprised by his son's intervention, but displeased nonetheless. "You... may speak."

"Loki is harmless as he is now, and he is suffering here the same he would anywhere. I would like to request he serves his sentence on Midgard, where he can be useful, instead of rotting in an Asgardian dungeon for eternity."

Loki froze.  
Why on Midgard? What was Thor planning?  
Had he perhaps made a deal with his mortal comrades? Did he promise them the god of mischief as a prisoner?

Unable to voice his protest, Loki watched the conversation unfold.

"Useful, you say?" Odin scoffed. "I assume you have something in mind. Do tell."  
"I would like to give him to Jane, father. Give her one hundred, maybe even less, years to study him. Then we shall take him back and you can do with him as you please. I ask this of you as a favor, and as compensation, for I had to seal my brother's lips with my own two hands."

"So this is about her." Odin's characteristics remained unchanged, save for the small smirk that appeared on his face. "I have to admit that it is an interesting idea. But it will not be without cost."  
"What is it you ask of me, father?"  
Odin leaned forward on his throne, the smile now gone from his lips. "You, my son, will become king in my place. I cannot let my kingdom fall apart as I grow older, I need a heir, and you will be that heir."

Loki couldn't help but wonder if Odin enjoyed having that conversation in front of him.

Thor's reply came surprisingly fast.  
"If that is the only way, father, then I am willing to accept your condition."

Loki also wondered if Thor was aware he was making an unfair trade, one hundred years for all eternity.  
But of course, Thor was foolish. Loki knew that.

And then he realized.  
One hundred years wasn't that long, but it would be long enough to break down his will.  
Loki didn't doubt they would succeed. He was already mentally devastated as it was.  
That was the plan, was it not?

He had just been sentenced to a hundred years as... what?  
A slave, a test subject. The guinea pig of a mortal woman who had every reason to hold a grudge against him.  
And without his magic, immobilized as he assumed he would be, that human girl could do anything she wanted to him.  
Until the mortal took her last breath, he would be there, obeying her.

Surely, this was all a joke. It had to be.  
Why did Thor want to torture him so? Was being sentenced to spend the rest of his life locked up not good enough for him?  
His assigned dungeon almost sounded homy now. But no, looks like they wouldn't even grant him the privacy of his own cell, he was going to have a human poke around his body and ask him questions he would be forced to answer.

A muffled sound escaped him, and Odin purposefully chose that moment to speak.  
"Good. Then you may depart in... twenty days. Loki will stay in the dungeons until then."

"I trust there is nothing holding us back," Thor said gingerly. "Does my brother have any reason to stay on Asgard any longer?"

"Oh, I'm afraid yes. This boy is dangerous by nature, he will easily trick the mortals into doing what he wants. Even without his voice, I know he will find a way to manipulate that woman. I will have my men set him up for his new life as a slave, so that he won't try anything."

"Father! Is this really necessary?! Loki has suffered enough already!"  
"If Loki manages to escape that mortal woman, we'll find him, and his punishment will be death. Would you prefer your brother was executed because he tried to run away, like the reckless fool he is? I'm sorry, my son, but we cannot risk it. We have to stop him before he even attempts it."

"Fath-" Thor paused, going over his father's words in his mind.

He still didn't think they had to torture Loki to warn him for the consequences of running away. He trusted that his brother was aware of those already.  
But he also knew his father well enough to be able to tell that once he had made a decision, it was pretty much impossible to change his mind.

Perhaps insisting would even make things worse. He couldn't risk Loki going through even more unnecessary pain because of him.

"Thank you, father." Thor kneeled, then quickly stood up. "I will take Loki to the dungeons. You may dismiss the guards."  
Odin nodded, and the men standing in front of the pillars and next to the throne bowed and left the hall with hurried steps.  
Loki could feel drops of sweat forming on his forehead.

Thor grabbed hold of the younger god, who found himself squirming desperately, trying to break free from his grip.

He would prefer to have kept his composure up to the very end, but it didn't really matter now, did it?

He had twenty days of Odin's sweet torture ahead of him.  
And then there would be more torture, this time down on Midgard.

For the next one hundred years, or whatever was that woman's remaining lifespan, Loki was to spend all of his waking time in some dark basement, strapped on a metal table.  
At least that's how he pictured it.

So if he lost his dignity now, and if he lost it in a week, a month, what difference would it make?

He highly doubted he would still be 'Loki' by the time he returned to Asgard.  
People would resent him all the same. But it would be useless.  
Because by the time he came back, Loki knew he would be as good as dead.

As Thor was dragging him out of the throne room, grip painful on his thin arm, there was only one thing on Loki's mind;

Oh, how he longed for that dungeon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!~
> 
>  
> 
> So this is my first Marvel fic and I'm new in this fandom, so you might end up finding some parts that are not canonically correct (I mean, besides the parts that are supposed to not be canonically correct - this is a fanfiction, after all). But I will do my best to keep those to a minimum!
> 
> I do not intend for this to turn into romance, but expect to see a lot of platonic F/M love here.
> 
>  
> 
> Thoughts and concerns are always welcome and deeply appreciated! Do leave a comment if you'd like. <3


	2. A Favor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the lovely comments on the first chapter! Every single one of them made me really happy. <3
> 
> Phew, this chapter was exhausting. I don't think I've ever had to edit something this much before.
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy!~

_Why._

_Why._

Loki's head was spinning.

_Do you really hate me that much?_

"I'm sorry, brother. What you go through these next twenty days, it'll be because of me... However..."

_What have you done?_   
_What the hell have you done?!_

"...It will be worth it. I thought I'd let you enjoy your life for a few more years before you never leave that dungeon again," Thor explained. "I figured Jane would be the best option. She'll take good care of you."

If Loki could speak, at that moment, he'd yell. He'd scream.  
He could understand why Thor would find pleasure in torturing someone who betrayed him the way he had. But this was just too much.  
Did he really have to go that far, to sacrifice his own freedom and take on the throne despite not wanting to become king, all just for the sake of revenge?

On top of that, Thor seemed to enjoy keeping up the role of the loving big brother who did nothing wrong, who can and will forgive anything, because he is better than the little brother who foolishly sticks to silly things like resentment and anger.

At least that's how Loki chose to view his behavior, at that moment. It was easier that way.

After all, Thor, who claimed to love him, had sealed his lips and sentenced him to a fate Loki considered even worse than the one Odin had chosen for him.  
And now he was mocking him?

Perhaps Loki would do that too, if he could.  
He wasn't reckless enough to say it out loud, but he would love to see his ex-brother in chains. On his knees, begging for his life to be spared.  
Or, even better, begging to die.

Loki flashed a bitter smile at the thought that the fate he wished for the god of thunder was apparently his own, and it was Thor himself who had made sure of that.

But in the end, it was only fair, right?  
Because Thor was the good guy. The merciful brother. The better son.

Right, _father?_

"Here we are." Thor let go of Loki's arm and gave him an encouraging pat on the shoulder.

Ah, it felt a bit nostalgic, almost as if they were siblings again.  
Only Thor thought that, of course.

Despite what he had said, until that day, Loki still secretly viewed Thor as his brother.  
He always told himself he would be able to go back, if he wished it.  
Thor always forgave him, and Loki knew he would be able to do the same one day, if he truly wanted it.

But as Thor worked on his mouth with the needle, something changed inside Loki. He saw things for what they were.  
He could never take back what he had done. And he knew he wouldn't be able to forgive Thor, either.  
That realization hurt more than the needle itself. It pierced deeper, left marks that would take a lot longer to heal than his lips.

Thor's voice pulled Loki out of his thoughts. "Stay strong, brother." He still insisted in calling him that. "It's twenty days, and then I'll come get you. You'll get a break."

A break from what?  
From Asgard? From Odin?  
That was just ridiculous. A prison is a prison, no matter what realm it's located in.  
He could see no point in any of Thor's words. It was frustrating.

Loki held his head up as he entered the dungeons, guessing that it would be his last chance to do so without someone grabbing him and shoving it back down.

It was kind of scary, knowing that whatever was going to walk, or rather be carried, out of those dungeons twenty days later was only going to be a shadow, a ghost of the previous Loki. Resigned to his fate, only knowing fear of punishment and willing to do anything in his power to avoid it.

He'd seen it happen before.  
Prisoners who had that spark of rebellion, of mischief in their eyes, leaving the torture chambers weeks later as obedient slaves who wouldn't dare look anyone in the eye.

Loki had that spark for as long as he could remember.  
He could pretend to be obedient, it was one of his many ways to trick people, to earn their trust and manipulate them, to get on their good side and then firmly backstab them.  
But for how long?  
He could play that role for a while. Say, a month, maybe two, depends on the treatment. He could pull that off. But longer than that?

He had many years of servitude in front of him. No doubt he was going to snap, eventually.  
And quitting wouldn't be an option. Because this time, to serve wasn't his own choice to begin with.

 

* * *

 

Twenty days passed on Asgard, and on Earth, just a little longer.

Darcy had called earlier that day, whined about what an asshole Ian was for forty minutes straight, and then announced she was coming over for lunch.

Jane knew they were gonna make up eventually, probably awfully fast, but still listened to her friend rant and hurried to agree whenever Darcy called Ian a total moron who didn't try to understand her feelings at all.

The first time something like this had happened, namely after the two's very first fight as a couple, Darcy had spoken as if she never wanted to see him again.  
But now Jane had learned the pattern and she knew they would just work things out on their own sooner or later.

Their fights were almost always about insignificant things anyway. If only it was like this with Jane's relationships, too.

One more thing Jane knew was that after every supposed breakup, Darcy was as hungry as she was pissed, so she was making extra pasta. Lots of it.  
The last time Darcy had come over to drown her sorrows in Jane's cooking, Jane had ended up eating salad for lunch. She wasn't planning on letting that happen again when she's not even on a diet.

Still, she was kind of thankful for the unexpected company, since her boyfriend literally lived in another realm and rarely ever visited.  
The distance constantly had them on the point of wanting to call it quits, but never having the time to properly do so.  
Jane didn't want to hurry, she wanted to do this right.  
Which only made things harder.

Because Jane loved Thor, she really did, but it was obvious that this whole thing wasn't going to work out.  
How they never got to officially end it only made it worse for her, because even knowing that it was pretty much over from both sides, she just couldn't bring herself to stop caring and start looking for a new partner just yet.

The doorbell rang twice, pulling Jane out of her thoughts. Then one more time. And another.  
Yup, that was Darcy, and she was hungry.  
Jane stirred the contents of the pot twice, and then hurried to the door as the rhythmic tune of the doorbell kept playing.

"That bad, huh?" Jane laughed as she grabbed the door's handle. "Calm down, lunch's almost- Oh."

To her surprise, it was Thor who she found standing there, awkwardly messing with the doorbell button and trying to figure out how to make it open the door.

Jane's face brightened up. It had been months since the last time he'd come over and despite everything, she had really missed him.  
Plus, it was nice to know he still somewhat cared about her, enough to pay her a visit.

"Thor!" Without missing a beat, she stood on her toes and brought her mouth to his, holding the kiss for some seconds before finally parting their lips and taking a step back. "Stay for lunch! We're having that spaghetti you liked when you last came over. Darcy's on her way, too."

It would be fine, she thought to herself, there was surely enough food for the three of them. It wasn't good for Darcy to eat too much after every fight, anyway.

Thor hesitated. Finally noticing his serious expression, Jane frowned and softly placed a hand on his cheek. She noted the way he avoided her gaze.  
"Thor? Is everything alright?"  
"Jane... I have to talk to you."  
Jane drew her hand back.

Was that it? Had Thor come to officially end their relationship?  
Jane knew it had been doomed, perhaps from the very start, and she thought she was ready to end it as soon as possible. She was now realizing how much it meant to her, how badly she didn't want to let go.

Back when they first met, Jane had thought she wanted nothing more than to be with Thor. What they had was something really special, she could tell.  
And now it was all over.  
Maybe it was better that way, but that didn't make it hurt any less.

Jane took a deep breath and braced herself for the words she knew she'd hear next.  
But they never came.

Thor stepped aside, revealing a chained Loki with his head down.  
"I assume you remember my brother, Loki," he started, not daring to look her in the eyes.

Jane instinctively brought a hand to her mouth, grimacing in nonexistent pain. "Oh, my god, he is- that's- What happened to him?!"  
"I want to ask you for a favor, Jane."  
Loki momentarily looked up.

Why would he call it a 'favor'?  
It was Thor who was making her a favor.  
Aside from being a god, Loki's system was a lot more durable than any human's, so she would be able try so many things on him. Loki knew that if he was Jane, he'd be extremely grateful to have such a specimen.  
She should be _thanking_ him.

"What is it, Thor?" Jane asked, not taking her eyes off the younger god. The words that came out of her clenched jaw were forced, teeth pressed together to the point it was almost painful, but she didn't seem to even notice.

"I'm... no, my father, Odin..." Thor began, "...is asking for you to keep him under your custody. You can do whatever you want to him, as long as you don't kill him."

"My... custody?" Jane repeated. "What... Thor, what happened to his lips?"  
Thor didn't answer.

"Jane, I... please," he begged. "I need you to take care of him until he has to return to his dungeon in Asgard. I want to give to him a chance to actually live, before that time comes."  
"Thor, why... why me?"  
"You're the only one I can trust to take good care of Loki."

Loki assumed he meant that out of his Midgardian friends, Jane was the only one who wouldn't attack him and slice his throat on sight.  
And by 'taking care of him', was he referring to putting him to good use?  
Well, whatever. Did it actually matter what he was to be used for? It was going to be uncomfortable and painful and humiliating. That's all he needed to know, for now.

"Back in Asgard, they'll... they'll hurt him," Thor added when faced with Jane's uncertainty.

He had managed to appear calm and collected until that moment, but that last part was all it took for his facade to fall apart and his desperation to show. Jane didn't need more than a second to spot it.  
He was begging for her to take in his brother as if his life depended on it.

Suddenly, Jane truly felt a strong urge to accept. She couldn't bear to see him like this, neither of the two gods, in fact.  
But everything was going too fast, how could she just take Loki in as if he were a kitten she found on the street?

"But isn't he, like... dangerous and... evil, or something?" she asked gingerly.  
"Loki will bring you no harm." Thor hesitated for a moment, and then added in a quieter voice; "Odin has had his behavior... corrected."  
"Corrected, how?"  
The man lowered his head, looking for a way to escape the question. "Jane, I wouldn't be asking this of you if it involved danger."  
"I know, that's not..." Jane made a sad expression. "That's not what I want to know, Thor."

It wasn't a question, so Thor risked ignoring this one, too.  
"I have to return to Asgard shortly." He took the woman's hand in his and squeezed it gently. This time he was looking into her eyes, his face serious. "Please, take good care of my brother. I will come visit him soon."

He kissed the back of her hand, giving her one last loving look, and made for the stairs before stopping in his tracks.  
"Oh, I almost forgot! This is the key to his chains, in case you have to remove them."

Jane accepted the key silently, and then watched Thor walk away. She didn't try to stop him.

"Come in," she muttered tiredly, now addressed to Loki.  
The man flinched slightly upon being directly spoken to by his new mistress for the first time, but recovered promptly and walked in as instructed.

Jane closed the door behind him. All she could do was sigh as she took a better look at his battered state.

Although his clothing looked new and covered most of his wounds, Jane could tell they were there, the blood stains smearing the formal attire serving as unwavering proof.

But that wasn't all.  
Apart from the things she could easily spot by just having a look at him, such as his black eye and red marks, judging by the way he moved, Jane was almost certain he had a couple broken toes and maybe a sprained ankle, too.

But the most disturbing part was those stitches on his mouth, forcing it shut.  
The sight of it was utterly obnoxious. The wounds were striving to heal, fighting against the unhealthy conditions the god had been living under those past weeks, but until now it had been a losing battle. They almost looked fresh.

Jane guessed it was mainly because of the lack of sleep which was evident and easy to spot on his tired face, but at least now it wouldn't hurt as much to remove the thick leather thread that held them shut as it would have if he had made more progress in healing.

She only hoped Loki hadn't been awake and conscious as they stitched his lips, but she knew that was just wishful thinking. Someone who was willing to do something like this to another person obviously wouldn't care about causing them pain.

Jane would love to take Loki to a hospital, have someone else take care of him while she has time to gather her thoughts, but that just wasn't an option.  
She knew better than anyone that the organization S.H.I.E.L.D. had eyes everywhere and if he were to appear publicly, Loki would quickly end up being unhappily taken away by their agents, who she knew wouldn't show him any mercy.  
She couldn't afford that.

"Alright... For starters, let's clean you up," Jane said flatly. "This way."

A reasonable decision, Loki thought to himself.  
He hadn't bathed for over two weeks and his clothing was soaked in blood, of course she'd want to get him cleaned before doing anything else.

He followed Jane to the bathroom, which felt pretty small to him, an ex-prince.  
Loki was surprised by his own reaction. He should be glad he is allowed to clean up, not judge his mistress' house, even if he hadn't said anything out loud. It just felt wrong, it didn't fit his lowly position.

Perhaps twenty days of strict torture were enough to change his habits, but not his attitude.  
Loki had been raised a prince, and that part of him was going to be hard to change. He was certain someone was going beat it out of him eventually, but for now, he had to play the role of a slave and not let his real self show.  
That should do for now, he kept telling himself.

Loki watched Jane grab two plastic bottles, a purple and a white one.  
"I'm afraid I don't have any men's hygiene products, so you'll have to settle for my flowery shampoo for now," she spoke, adding it to the list of things she'd have to get for Loki the next time she went out.

Loki simply stared, his face blank.  
There was a moment of silence, Jane thinking maybe she should fetch him a pen and a piece of paper in case he needed to say something, but her thoughts were once again interrupted by the sound of the doorbell.

Jane jumped. "Uh, right! I've got to go. You can wash, right? I'll just leave you to it, I have... a guest. For any questions just call out to me. Okay, bye."

Jane hurried to the door, mentally kicking herself when she remembered that Loki couldn't call out to her, he couldn't speak at all.  
She shook her head. He was going to be just fine, all he had to do was clean himself. Even a child could do that.  
She decided to go check on him sometime later, while Darcy would be busy murdering the spaghetti.

Jane stopped to take a deep breath, put on a cheeky grin, and opened the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! <3
> 
> All comments are deeply appreciated (and if we are to be honest, they speed up my writing). ;)


	3. A Series Of Misunderstandings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! ^^
> 
> I watched the first Avengers movie!  
> Now I see just what I'd missed and I'm kinda embarrassed for not even noticing that something was missing between Thor and TDW. But this really sounds like me, so.
> 
> Anyway! This chapter took me longer to finish than I had planned. Thank you all for sticking around! <3
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy~

Loki looked down at the chains on his wrists, and those around his ankles.

His mistress hadn't specified exactly what he had to do, apart from washing himself.  
Surely she was aware he couldn't strip with the chains on, right?  
He had watched Thor give her the key, and he was pretty sure that she still held it in her palm when she left the bathroom.

Was he supposed to bathe with the clothes on?  
Maybe it was a Midgardian thing. Maybe it was so that Jane could have the clothes cleaned along with her slave. It was formal clothing, after all, and not everyone could afford to buy new clothes every time someone showed up on their doorstep with a slave.

Or maybe his mistress thought it goes without saying that he was to rip the clothing and then throw away the ruined rags.  
It was possible that she wanted him to wear some uniform, something more fitting of his position. Something easier for her to work with. She was a professional, after all.  
Or perhaps he was to wear nothing at all.  
Although that was his least favorite guess, for a test subject, it made sense.

Loki dismissed the comment about calling out to her in case he needed anything as mere mockery. It was fine, he could handle that and much more.  
Jane hadn't striken him as the type that laughs at others' misfortune, but who knows, maybe evil villains were an exception.  
Since she seemed to enjoy joking about it, did that mean Jane wasn't planning on cutting the thread on his lips? He was hoping she was going to at least do that, even if just to question him.

But that was okay, too. Unlike humans, Loki could survive years without food or drink. It would be painful for his stomach and he hoped he would manage to avoid vomiting during that time, but he wouldn't die from it.

It was possible that even without consuming anything during his time on Midgard, Jane would still perish from natural causes long before he starved to death.

He decided food wasn't a cause of concern; Jane wouldn't have to feed him, and once he returned to Asgard, they would most likely have his lips freed once every few hundred years in order to feed him, just enough to keep him alive, and then they'd sew them again.

Hah, maybe it'd be Thor, the one to–

 _Don't think about the future,_  he reminded himself.  
It was a decision he had made back in the dungeons, mostly in order to keep his sanity through the whole thing, and whatever was to come after.

And anyway, he already had enough problems as it was.  
Out of all things Jane could have possibly done to mess with his head, giving him unclear orders was probably one of the worst. He always ended up messing up, back in the dungeons, and what followed was never pleasant  
He only wished he was making the right choice, as he started pulling at the leather.

It was hard to tear, especially in his weakened state, but Loki eventually managed to fully remove the clothing.  
He folded the remains as well as he could and placed them on the cabinet, next to the bathroom sink.  
Now all he could do was hope that was what Jane had expected from him.  
He wasn't all that eager to discover the scientist's methods of punishment on his very first day.

 

* * *

 

Rather than angry, Darcy looked sad.  
Not as devastated as Jane remembered herself being after most breakups, but still a lot more than she had expected from this particular woman.

"Still can't forgive him?" Jane asked, arms crossed as she leaned on the door frame, amused smile on her face.  
Darcy's expression changed to something angrier, although still somewhat soft, as if she only just remembered about that.

"He's an idiot," she announced, calmly, as she walked in the apartment. "And I'm still in love with him, meaning I can't even go looking for one-night-stands to recover from my heartbreak. Jane, this is the worst."

Darcy walked past Jane and went to sit down at the kitchen table, crossing arms and legs as soon as her back touched the chair, and waiting for lunch to be served.  
Jane sighed deeply and went to dry the spaghetti.

"So, what have you been up to?" Darcy questioned, before her lips formed a mischievous grin. "Any hot dudes that are here to stay?"  
Jane nearly chocked at the question.  
"Hey, no way!" Darcy exclaimed, picking up on her friend's suspicious behavior. "Who is he? More importantly, is he buff?" Her smile kept getting wider and wider. "And here you said you didn't want to start looking yet. So you got over the muscly guy already, huh?"

Jane could feel sweat forming on her forehead as she struggled to put the words in her head in order, while making it sound believable.  
"Woah, slow down! You've got it all wrong." Her expression switched from serious to playful, and then serious again. The edge of her mouth twitched slightly. It happened a lot when she got nervous.  
"I'm... I'm not really seeing anyone right now."

Hot guys that are here to stay, on the other hand, Jane might have been able to name a few.  
Oh, lord, she had a god in her bathroom. Realization started dawning upon her.

Well, Jane of all people should have been used to it by now, her boyfriend (read: ex) being the actual God of Thunder and all, but this was the villain who tried to take over Manhattan and killed, actually killed people by his own free will we're talking about.

"It's just..." Jane continued, not quite satisfied with her act so far, "I've been thinking about Thor a lot lately. I don't think I'm over him yet..."

"Aw. My bad." Darcy laughed, showing Jane a guilty smile that accompanied an otherwise unreadable expression.

She didn't sound fully convinced, but it looked like she wasn't planning on pushing this any further; for now, at least.  
Which was, frankly, quite unlike her.

Darcy clapped her hands together, leaving the whole conversation behind. "So. What are we having?"

 

* * *

 

Loki hissed when the water met his wounds.  
Every touch stang so much he wanted to cry out, but unable to make a sound and unable to disobey his mistress' orders, he scrubbed on the wounds until they were definitely clean; and until his hands were painted red in his own blood.

He gave up on trying to make the bleeding stop when he was still in the tub and completely wet.  
Instead, he finished cleaning the rest of his body, using the contents of one of the two bottles his mistress had showed him; the purple one.  
The thick liquid it contained had a very pleasant aroma, and Loki wished he wouldn't soon find himself having to compensate for using his mistress' own personal 'shampoo', as she had called it.

Next, he poured some of the white bottle's contents on his palm, always reminding himself not to use too much, but enough to get the job done properly.  
After all, just because bathing after so long was pleasant -although painful- didn't mean his mistress' order to get cleaned was to be taken lightly.

Next, Loki proceeded to apply the sticky substance on his hair, making sure to rub to the point of discomfort, if not pain, until most of the dirt and grease on his hair seemed to have gone away.  
But he knew some of it would need more than just one wash to completely disappear.

He left his lips last.  
He doubted they would hurt to wash any more than his back, which was already full of welts, but he would have to be extra careful not to tear anything.  
Plus, he had a feeling it would take him long enough to just get rid of the dried blood that had stuck on the thick thread, and he knew it required a lot of patience.

Firstly, he soaked the thread, hoping that would make it easier to work with.  
The water was cold by now. His throat was dry as a desert, and it was more than just tempting. Feeling it but being unable to drink it, it was torture.

Loki attempted to open his mouth slightly and managed to get some water in it in the process. It felt really good at first, and a wave of relief washed over him.  
He had almost forgotten what feeling 'good' was like.  
He was quick go regret it, however, when he felt the nausea begin to settle at the pit of his empty stomach.

By the time he was done, Jane still hadn't returned. He could hear female voices from the other room; his mistress and her guest, he assumed.  
To interrupt the two was the last thing he wanted at the moment, so he decided to start cleaning the mess he had left in the tub.  
He figured he'd have to do it later, anyway, and he would prefer if Jane didn't have to see the bloody mess he had made while cleaning his wounds.

Loki suspected that Jane strongly disliked the sight of blood, judging from her reaction when see first laid eyes on him that day, and the way she stared at him after, looking away in something he identified as disgust ever so often.  
Frankly, that was another surprise, since Loki had expected the scientist to be okay with dissecting and otherwise studying... stuff.

He really didn't know exactly what she was studying. Maybe she wasn't even into that vivisection business, perhaps she'd have him answer questions or use him to run tests, like for example, comparing his pain tolerance or recovery pace to that of Midgardians'.

He was kind of curious to know which it was, but more than that he was nervous. Not scared, at least not as much as he thought he should be, but unwilling.

Unwilling to go through more pain. Unwilling to face any more consequences. Unwilling to fail again.  
But not having to go through any of those again sounded like a childish fantasy to him. He wouldn't even dare allow himself to dream about any of that.  
He knew there was no escape.

On top of it all, this human was his brother's precious. Who knows what would happen if he disobeyed.  
And at a time like this, when he is standing on ice thinner than any other time, so much as laying a finger on her would be like having an honest death wish.

Loki inhaled from his nose instead of sighing.  
He had barely started cleaning the tub, using the hair shampoo -which he assumed wasn't supposed to be used in this way but it got the job done anyway- and his own palms.  
That's when he heard a knock on the door.

"Everything alright in there? Can I come in?"

Jane sounded like she was in a hurry, and Loki would be more than happy not to waste her time, but there seemed to be an issue here. Either she was really forgetful, or she just loved giving him impossible tasks such as stripping with chains on and speaking when his lips were sealed.  
What next? Offering him a drink and expecting him to have it?

Jane realized her mistake just a moment too late.  
"No, nevermind. Wait, I'm... I'll go fetch a towel. Be right back."

What for, he meant to ask her, but that again was impossible. Loki waited.

"I'm back." Jane opened the door just enough to pass Loki the towel, who looked at it uncertainly.  
He was really absorbed in getting his cleaning done and the extra points that would earn him because, hey, he was a good slave! He had learned his purpose! He didn't need to be taught anything else through torture!

So when he eyed the towel in his hands, his first guess was that he was supposed to clean the tub with it.  
But then he started having more thoughts; what if he was meant to dry himself with it? He was sure he was going to find himself in Jane's lab soon enough, she obviously wouldn't want him soaked and dripping all over the place.

Which one was it?

A whole minute passed, and Jane waited patiently until she was almost certain Loki would have finished; wrapping the towel around himself, that is.

"I'm coming in," she announced, barely stopping herself from adding 'alright?' to that.

The door opened, and both froze.

As soon as she realized what was going on, Jane meant to look away, but all the faded red on Loki's otherwise white, bare form caught her eye.

She could spot countless welts all over his chest -which she guessed she would also find on his back if she were to look-, cuts and bruises from getting beaten or thrown around, even several burn marks, some quite fresh.  
Just as she had suspected, his ankle was swollen and red, most likely a broken bone in the middle of healing.

She was about to look away and apologize, when she eventually spotted the chains that stood out on Loki's pale form. She quickly scanned the room, spotting the torn leather clothing she had seen him wear earlier, on the cabinet.  
"Shit," she whispered.

So he was supposed to bathe with the clothes on, after all?  
Loki felt disappointment take over him, but hurried to mask it with that blank stare he had grown so good at faking.  
It was okay. He'd do better next time.

Loki kneeled on the floor, before his mistress. He had failed.

Even if she wasn't going to hit him directly like his new posture suggested, at least this way he could show her that he recognized his fault and accepted his punishment, without speaking.  
He had learned that instead of fighting back, it was much easier to abide.  
After all, if pain couldn't be avoided, at least he could spare himself the extra punishment for resisting.

It was so strange; for the first ten days he spent in the dungeons, maybe longer, he would always fight back with all his might, resist, never willingly kneel.  
Even before that, he was the one who made others kneel.

And now it was the first thing he would do after messing up. How humiliating.

Jane placed a hand on her forehead, sighing loudly. "I'm sorry. I have no idea where my head is at today. Let me..."  
She put a hand in her pocket and brought out the key, before eventually giving Loki a confused look.

"Are you okay? Why are you kneeling? I'm... I'm not mad, if that's what this is about." She paused. "Well, I am mad, the whole take-over-Manhattan business and all. But just for now, let's leave that aside and focus on the urgent stuff. Unless you're hurt, you can get up."

Loki didn't waste a heartbeat, immediately standing up.  
"Let me see the cuffs," Jane ordered, and Loki showed her his wrists.

The scientist searched around the metal for a while, and then finally inserted the key in what she thought was the smallest keyhole she'd ever seen.  
The handcuffs came off with a clank. She removed them and placed them on the cabinet.

"I assume the ankle cuffs have the same keyhole?" she asked. Loki nodded, fighting the urge to rub on the red marks on his wrists.  
He wouldn't know, but it sounded logical, and better than shrugging off his mistress' question.

To his surprise, Jane handed him the key. "Here."  
He took it suspiciously, and gingerly unlocked the ankle cuffs, low-key expecting a blow of some sort, while he had his head lowered and was looking down.  
Nothing came, and he handed the key back to Jane, along with the cuffs.

"You should use the towel," Jane said with an unreadable expression. "Dar– A friend of mine is here, so I suggest waiting for her to leave before–"

There was a knock on the door, and Jane froze like a deer caught in headlights.

"Jane? You alive? You've been in there for, like, forever. What the heck did you eat?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah, Loki spent almost the entire chapter stark naked (I'm claiming this pun in case I ever write a frostiron fic). It really wasn't meant to be for fan-service purposes, though.
> 
>  
> 
> Yay, another chapter is done! Do let me know your thoughts! :DD


	4. A Moment Of Forbidden Relief

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! I hope you guys are doing well! <3
> 
> I am happy to announce that this chapter is much longer than the previous ones! :DD

Jane and Loki exchanged a look, but Loki didn't hold it for long, averting his gaze a moment after.  
Although that wasn't quite what he intended for it to look like, Jane took it as a 'sorry, you're alone on this'.  
She gulped, and spoke.

"Just a moment! I have a little, uh... p- problem here," she stuttered, trying to come up with something more detailed for when Darcy would ask her to elaborate.

"Oh, as in lady problems? Are you okay?" Darcy questioned, and she sounded both concerned and suspicious.  
"Yes, that's it," Jane lied, not particularly happy to have done so. "I'm fine. You go eat, I'll be right there."  
"...got it."

Jane listened carefully as Darcy walked away. When she was certain she couldn't be heard anymore, she talked to Loki.

"Dry yourself with that towel. If you can wait here five, no, ten minutes, I'll get rid of Darcy and then we'll properly take care of your wounds." Remembering about his ankle, Jane added; "You can sit. Wherever. Bring down the toilet lid and sit there, if you want. Ten minutes. Just stay and... don't touch anything."

Loki was thinking about how to bring to his mistress' attention that the towel would get completely ruined if he were to use it on his wounds, to make sure she's okay with that, but she was already gone.

He unfolded the towel.  
Even though it was a simple design, it still looked quite pretty; a white background decorated with pictures of colorful flowers and curved lines, colored in soft pink and light green.  
Loki doubted it would ever go back to its original colors if he were to use it in his current state, covered in water mixed with blood.

Was that really okay? Was it safe? Or would he have to pay for ruining it?  
It was his mistress' order to use it, and yet...

Loki bit his lower lip.  
Maybe Jane had many towels. Maybe she was planning on throwing this one away. Maybe she didn't like it in the first place.  
Oh, perhaps she was going to give him this one as his own. That made sense!  
It'd most likely end up permanently stained, but fine to use for a slave.

That made him feel a bit better. He used the towel.

 

* * *

 

Jane had started to get quite tired of monologuing.  
Sure, it would be a good thing if this man, who starting today was apparently her prisoner, was being quiet during his stay. But this was just ridiculous.

She had many questions that couldn't be answered with a mere shake of the head.  
She needed to fix his lips as soon as possible, for the shake of both giving him back his voice and sparing herself the disturbing sight of sewn lips.

Jane's mind was going over ways to make Darcy leave as fast as possible, but she couldn't imagine herself actually succeeding.  
Telling her she had something to do would be more than suspicious, it would be straight up telling her she is hiding something.

Well, perhaps she would just leave on her own. She'd told Jane everything over the phone, now her stomach was full, it should be any moment now that she...

"Say, can I use the bathroom?"

Instead of sitting to finish her meal, Jane found her friend standing in the middle of the room, palm lightly resting on the kitchen table. She was giving her a suspicious stare, poorly disguised as her usual chill look.

And even if her face hadn't given everything away, the mere fact that she was asking for permission instead of just going was already odd.

Jane gulped. She had been cornered. Darcy had obviously discovered the lie and there was no way she was going to leave without an explanation.

The truth. She had to tell the truth. There was nothing else she could do.  
Why was it such a bad thing, anyway? Darcy liked to play around and tease, and also flirted a lot, but she wasn't untrustworthy.  
So if Jane wasn't worried about Darcy giving the secret away, why was she willing to go that far and lie to her best friend, all just to protect... who?  
The villain who took the lives of so many people?

It just sounded... unpleasant. The whole idea of showing Loki to anyone, it sounded unpleasant.  
When he kneeled in front of her earlier, he obviously wasn't aware of it, but he looked... not scared, but disappointed.  
Disappointed with how things had turned out. Not about kneeling, about something else, something she just couldn't quite understand.

And while she felt like she should be happy to see him like this, if not for revenge then just for the peace of mind it offers to know the God of Mischief, enemy of humanity, is in no state to harm anyone anymore, she just... couldn't.  
She felt bad.

He obviously wouldn't enjoy meeting Darcy, or anyone else for that matter, in his current state.  
She just... didn't want to see him suffer anymore. That was too much, even for a god.  
Just for that day, she felt like not making him go through any more unpleasant things.

And so, despite the voice in her head anxiously screaming at her to just tell the truth, and knowing full well how relieving it would be to finally get it out of her chest, the words that came out of her mouth were far from the truth.

"Alright, alright, you got me. Yes, I'm hiding something."  
Darcy didn't even blink, waiting for Jane to continue.  
"Well, I was kind of..." _Think, Jane, think._ "...planning a surprise for you... To make up for that one time when I had work and couldn't hang out on your birthday..."  
Jane watched as her friend's mouth opened slightly in shock.  
"Hiding it in the bathroom was probably not the best idea, but I didn't expect you'd come so soon and panicked... I'm sorry for acting so strange..."

She couldn't hate herself more for saying this.  
Not only was she lying to her friend, she was saying things that would probably make her sad.  
She promised herself to make up for it as soon as possible.

"No, that's my fault," Darcy said. "I'm sorry for not trusting you... You obviously had a good reason to not want me to go in there. My bad..."

Jane could think of very few things that could make Darcy apologize, and even fewer that would make her make that face.  
She had never thought she'd ever be the one to cause it, and deliberately at that.

"No, no, it's okay," Jane said calmly, keeping up her act. "I haven't even told you what it is. It's still sixty eight percent a surprise!"

"I'll be waiting, then. No, even better, I won't be waiting." Darcy's lips formed a half-smile. "I'll just forget about it. Woah, it's gone. What were we talking about?"

Jane returned the smile. "Thanks."  
Darcy giggled. "That's my line."

Act or not, they both went back to their normal attitudes, and roughly two minutes later, Darcy was gone.

"That... could've gone better," Jane whispered to herself, and headed back to the bathroom.

In order to keep the lie, she'd have to prepare a surprise for Darcy. That wasn't trouble, it was the easiest part.  
The guilt that came with it was going to be the hardest to bear, but she was certain she'd get over it eventually. Or at least positive.  
Perhaps once Thor came back for his brother, she could finally tell Darcy.

How long could it possibly take? Two months? Three? A year, maybe?  
As far as she remembered, Thor hadn't mentioned for how long she was supposed to look after Loki, but it couldn't be over one year, could it?  
It would be a real struggle to keep him hidden for that long. It was the first day and she had almost gotten caught already.  
But for Thor, she'd have to find a way. She was confident she would.

Jane knocked on the bathroom door, feeling devastated, but not regretful.  
She wasn't ashamed of the choice she had made, but choosing Loki over Darcy, it made her feel like she wasn't being herself.  
Although what she had actually chosen was to upset a friend in order not to make an enemy have an actual panic attack then and there.  
She was being... merciful.  
When she put it like this, it certainly made her feel better.

Naturally, there was no answer to Jane's knock.  
"I'm coming in," she announced. "Knock on something if that's okay."

She heard a hesitant tap from the other side of the door.  
A sigh escaped her lips as she entered.

Just like she had suggested, Loki was sitting on the toilet lid, although quite restlessly, as if worried he was too heavy. Which was, frankly, quite pointless, since he probably weighed less than Jane herself at the time.

This time, Loki had the now-bloody towel wrapped around his waist, just as instructed.

But something bothered Jane; she had never said anything about covering himself with it, but Loki did anyway, which meant that he already knew the use of a towel.  
If so, she couldn't help but wonder why he'd hesitated before and wouldn't use it. Was there something holding him back?  
If only he could speak, everything would be so much easier...

"Alright. There is no time to waste right now."  
Jane casually placed her hands on her hips, then tilted her head towards the living room. "Let's wrap you up."

Now what did she mean by that?  
Loki gulped.

When Jane turned around and headed to the direction she'd pointed at earlier, Loki followed, forcibly suppressing the hints of fear from leaking on his expression.

What kind of unpleasant thing was he going to have to go through now?  
Whatever it was, it couldn't be worse than the dungeons... could it?

It was hard to keep his posture with the pain on his ankle increasing every passing second, but that was better than limping in front of his mistress.  
He couldn't help being injured, of course, but he still didn't want to take any chances. What if Jane considered it improper and decided to punish him for it?

At this point he knew he was just being paranoid. But how could he not be? After the time he accidentally fell asleep without permission during his time in the dungeons and had a nail driven through his ankle joint for it, how could he not act paranoid?

A mere misstep could result in so much pain. He'd learned that back in Asgard. He couldn't afford to make any mistakes.

Jane hadn't gotten her revenge on him yet, after all. Loki knew that just that one time she got to slap him was not nearly enough to get back at him for what he had done to her people, or even her personally.

Real pain would come eventually, he knew it and he wanted to think he had accepted it.  
But the agony he felt while awaiting punishment for having messed up, that was a whole different thing.

The crushing feeling of being unable to escape was impossible to bear, and reminded him a lot of the day he had learned the news of his mother's death. The day he had failed to protect his mother, perhaps the only person he still treasured.  
So, naturally, he wanted to prevent it from happening when he could. He didn't want to give his mistress a reason to punish him sooner than she normally would.

Loki watched as Jane searched around a couple drawers. After she had collected all the items she was looking for, she returned to the living room, to find that Loki hadn't moved an inch from where she'd left him.

_He is being strangely obedient... Should I worry?_

"You can sit over there, on the couch. No, nevermind, I'll get you a chair, that'll be better."

So that he wouldn't dirty or otherwise damage the couch? Well, Loki couldn't blame her. Who would want blood on their furniture?

"Sorry, I know it's rougher than the couch," Jane began, "but it'll be easier to treat you when you're sitting in more open space. Is it okay?"

Loki nodded instinctively. Making his mistress wait was no good.

"Alright. You've already washed, but I need to disinfect your wounds just to be sure," Jane explained as she let a few drops of thick liquid wet a small piece of cotton.

Loki couldn't identify what it was, but it had a strong, odd smell, and it gave him a bad feeling.

What was that going to do to him once it was in his system?  
The question alone, without an answer, frightened him. Just barely. After all, he couldn't afford to be afraid, he was doing his best to turn all of his remaining emotions into indifference, apathy.

Jane waited until he had sat down, and then showed him her hand. Loki hesitated, unsure of what he was supposed to do.

"Show me your arm."

He obeyed, bringing his hand to hover over her palm, and eventually letting it rest on it.  
He wasn't sure if this is what he had to do, but Jane didn't seem to mind. She got down to business immediately.

She started coating every cut on his arm with the strange liquid. Her hand worked fast, and yet she was being gentle and careful.

It stang as the wet cotton was pressed against his wounds, but not enough to get a reaction out of him. Although he did flinch once, right when Jane was about to move on to another cut. He hoped she hadn't noticed, but she probably had.

After she was done with one arm, covering the biggest cuts with bandages and the smallest ones with band-aids, she asked to see the other. Once again, Loki obeyed.

She finished with his shoulders, too, and then his torso, his legs, all the way down to the swollen ankle.

"How did this happen?" Jane found herself muttering.  
Looking up at Loki, she noticed that he was staring at her in distress.  
"Ah, no, I was just thinking out loud," she reassured him, a voice in the back of her head questioning why he was looking at her like that. "It looks broken. Is it okay if I-"  
Loki nodded before Jane could finish her sentence.

That was fast. Didn't he care to know what she was going to do to his injured leg?

"...alright. Now, I'm going to scan you with a device that will allow me to see a picture of your bones, so that I can tell what is going on," she explained anyway. "It's just a scan, nothing dangerous. The device is my creation, but it has been tested. It'd completely safe."

Loki nodded again, unsure why his mistress was even telling him that.  
More importantly, why did she keep asking for his permission to do things to him?  
As if he could refuse. As if his knowing what is going to happen would make any difference to her.  
It seemed unreasonable and completely pointless.  
Then again, what did he know about midgardian scientists? Short answer; nothing. And about how they treated their slaves? Again, nothing. Who was he to question her methods?  
_Loki, prince of Asgard, heir to the throne of Asgard,_ a voice he barely recognized whispered in the back of his head, and he hurried to suffocate that voice before Jane could read his mind or something.

Paranoia. That certainly was paranoia.  
Sure, whatever. He was bound to become paranoid sooner or later, anyway.

Loki got up from the chair and stood as still as possible, while Jane scanned him twice with a strange device just a little larger than her palm.  
It had a tiny screen attached on its back side, and Jane was taking a good look there, eyes narrowed and focused, but her expression didn't change.

Loki believed he had grown good at reading expressions, as he had had to depend on that while he was in the dungeons.  
Reading the mood of a torturer and acting accordingly could spare a prisoner a lot of pain, apparently.

But Jane was a wonder. When he was looking at her, he couldn't identify any of those emotions he had learned so well.  
It made him uneasy, it was just another thing to add to his troubles.

After all, there was no way Jane wasn't mad at him. Why wasn't she showing it? Why wasn't she just taking it out on him? Just what was she planning?

Jane walked over to her laptop, which was placed on top of her messy desk, barely visible amongst the piles of papers and strange equipment that surrounded it.  
She connected her device with the laptop and had another look at the scans, on the laptop's screen this time.

The expression she made afterwards looked an awfully lot like concern.

"Don't just stand there," she muttered, her voice low and sad. "Sit down."  
Loki did as instructed.  
"I'm sorry, it looks like your leg has... already healed," Jane began. "I don't think it will be possible to set it now. I'm sure they would be able to do something about it at a hospital, but getting you out of the house is too reckless..."

Why? Was she worried he would try to escape?  
He already knew that disobedience and mischief led to nothing but pain. He would never do that.

But that really wasn't what was in Jane's mind; she knew that if they were to appear publicly, even under a disguise, S.H.I.E.L.D. would immediately know. And then Loki's time on Midgard would barely differ from those twenty days he spent on Asgard.

Loki didn't even twitch at Jane's words.  
A permanently ruined leg and the sewn lips that he had already accepted Jane wasn't going to fix weren't that bad.  
He still had his eyes, his arms, even one good leg. And he had learned to be thankful for all of them.  
Every single one of his senses that was still working, every last one of his bones that had been left in one piece.

The part that actually made him uneasy was Jane's sad expression.  
Was there a project she had been planning that had to be canceled now because of his state?  
He really couldn't think of another reason why she would make that face.

But she didn't say anything. She remained focused on his ankle while bandaging it, not taking her eyes away for one second.  
That couldn't be a good sign.

After she was finished, Jane cleared her throat and straightened her back. "I am going to treat your face now. Let's get this over with so we can eat."

_'We'?_

Was there someone coming over for lunch again?  
Just how many people did Jane invite at her place to eat every day?

Loki was starting to get nervous, but Jane didn't explain anything further, already preparing a new cotton with that strong-smelling liquid.

Well, he'd probably have to hide in another room again -hopefully somewhere less obvious than the bathroom this time- until the guest was gone. He could do that.

"Stand still," Jane instructed.  
She covered the wounds on his face with the mysterious liquid on the cotton, and the fear of what that might do to him creeped back in Loki's mind.

What if it was to make him sleep, and he woke up tied on a metal table, with cables and needles pinned on his skin?  
Although in that case, putting him to sleep certainly wouldn't be necessary.  
Because if Jane had ordered it, Loki would walk over to the bench himself and endure everything without making a sound. He wouldn't even need restraints to stay still.

This is what Odin's lessons had turned him into.  
He wanted to think that even though his behavior had changed, inside he was still 'Loki'.  
But he knew that it was a lie.  
He knew that a lot had changed inside him. He knew that he would never be given a chance to recover, to go back to the way he was, to feel like a person again.

In the end, he'd really ended up as just another one of those prisoners he'd watched leave the dungeons without that spark of rebellion in their eyes anymore.

After all, to suffer was the only fate awaiting for him now. There, on Midgard, and back on Asgard, too.

Ah, he really shouldn't be thinking about those things again.  
Thinking happy thoughts wasn't really an option, so he tried keeping his mind blank most of the time, but it wasn't always easy. Almost never, in fact.

He couldn't help but wonder what his mistress was planning to do with him.

Jane examined Loki's black eye, but didn't do anything besides asking him if he could see normally, to which he nodded as a response.

Jane took a chair and placed it across from Loki's, just a few inches away from him. She then walked over to another room and returned with a tiny pair of scissors in her hand.  
Loki's heartbeat sped up.

"I'm going to cut the thread now. Is this okay?"

There was a sharp pain on his mouth, and Loki realized it was due to the gasp that attempted to leave his sealed lips.

The thread, as in the thread Thor had put on his lips?  
The thread that had forced him to keep all those screams inside until now? She was going to remove it?  
But... why?  
No, that didn't matter... He just wanted it to disappear.  
That would be enough...

"...Loki?" Jane said quietly, noticing his hesitation. "Are you-"

It took her mind a moment to process what happened next.

Loki stood up, knocking down his chair as he did.  
And then, he fell on his knees.

"Wuh-" Jane took a step back.

Loki lowered his head and leaned on his palms. The pain from the sudden movement along with the stress and agony caused him to shake like crazy, but he still kept his eyes fixed on the floor.

_Please._

_Please!_

Jane was shocked. She couldn't move or speak, only stare.  
Slowly, she kneeled next to Loki, hand hovering over his shoulder but not actually touching.  
She didn't know what to do, but she couldn't allow panic to take over her now.

"Loki, look- look at me." Before she could stop herself, Jane placed a hand on his cheek.

Her hand was soft and gentle. A lot different than what Loki remembered from the last time her palm met his cheek, that one time she slapped him.

Loki raised his head and looked at her with fear in his eyes, as if afraid of her touch.  
Still, he didn't dare pull away. And neither did she.

Jane stared at him for a moment longer, deep in those eyes.  
Because of the way her expression changed, Loki thought it was almost as if she had been able to hear those screams locked inside him.  
And then, she brought the scissors to his mouth.

_Snip. Snip. Snip. Snip. Snip. Snip._  
And a sharp pain as she pulled the thread out of his skin.  
Again. And again. And again. And again.  
And then it stopped, and the next thing he felt was something soft being pressed against his lips.

When he didn't feel it anymore, he opened his eyes, not quite sure when he had closed them, and saw Jane holding a bloody handkerchief.  
She smiled, somewhat sadly.

"How do you feel?"

Loki started to panic at the question to which he couldn't answer with a simple shake of the head.

...but then he realized he didn't need to worry about that anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah, I can't believe there will finally be some actual communication in this fic. But I wouldn't expect much from these dorks if I were you, one of them is bound to misunderstand and mess up again sooner or later.
> 
>  
> 
> Hope you enjoyed! Let me know your thoughts! <3


	5. A Failure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, a trigger warning: there's a very brief scene that contains vomit in this chapter. Nothing too graphic, not even the word 'vomit', and it's a real quick part, but I thought I'd let you guys know anyway.
> 
>  
> 
> Hey, everyone! Thanks for sticking with me for another chapter!  
> I want to thank you guys for all the lovely comments left on this fic! Every single one made me so happy. <3
> 
> But I also love my silent readers, of course! I hope everyone is doing well!~
> 
>  
> 
> So, Loki can speak now... I heard you guys like miscommunications? >:3

Loki didn't waste any time getting overwhelmed with relief, or other emotions unsuitable for a slave.  
His mistress had asked him a question.

Which was... what, again?  
He was in a daze, even thinking hurt at this point...

Oh, that's right! She had asked him how he felt. He had his voice back now, he could answer. He had to answer.

Loki opened his mouth, but no sound came out.  
The taste of blood was back, and he was starting to feel more and more nauseous every passing second.  
And then it raised up on his throat, and he coughed and puffed his cheeks, struggling to hold it back.

Jane, immediately understanding the situation, rushed to his side and placed a hand on his shoulder.  
"Let it go, you'll feel better," she said, voice steady and gentle.

And so he did.  
Then, he could remember staring at the floor as his vision began to blur. He felt light, and then... everything faded into darkness.

 

* * *

 

"Brother!"

_Thor's... voice..._

Loki could hear it. But it was faint, as if far away.  
Had Thor come to see him in the dungeons?

Why?

"Let me in! I demand to see my brother!"

Ah, again...  
He had come to hate that voice, but now it sounded so comforting...

If only he had chosen a different path. If only he could listen to that voice every day, and come to love it.

If only he had chosen to be Thor's brother.

In the end, Thor didn't manage to get in and see him. His cries died out after a short while.  
Odin's orders to not let him in, probably...  
But maybe that was for the best. Loki was in a horrible state, and it would help neither of the two if Thor saw him like that.

His lips were bloody from trying to scream. His eyes, red from shedding so many tears of pain.  
And his left ankle joint, broken, with a nail he hadn't been allowed to remove passing through it.  
They had put it there so easily, so mercilessly, as if his bone was made of cheap plastic.

His body felt completely numb as he leaned against the stone wall. Even if he wanted to, he probably wouldn't be able to move his limbs.

He was unclothed from the waist up, so that the torturers would be able to punish him on spot if he did anything wrong. Which he knew he would, sooner or later.

There was nothing to protect him from the cold. It was pricking his skin, not allowing him even a single moment of peace.

And yet his ankle felt hot, too hot, like it was on fire...

Half-unconscious, Loki watched as his torturer switched with another for the day. Or for the night. He had no idea what was going on outside and, frankly, he didn't care.  
Ever since the torture started, the only difference between day and night was the color of the sky, nothing more.

His mind went over the events of the day of his trial.  
Repeating the memory of last time he felt the warmth of Thor's body, the instant right before he let go.  
He had hated it, back then. And now he hated being unable to experience it again, to hate it just for a moment longer.

Even if it teared his heart apart, Loki would do anything to have his lips unsealed, only just to have Thor sew them one more time. Just once. So that he could feel the warmth of his hands working over his mouth, and his hot tears rolling down his chin and dripping on Loki's cheeks.

He was starving, starving for psychical contact.  
It was strange. Although he didn't always hate Thor, and when he did, it was probably a lot less that he would want to admit, he still had never felt like this before.

There were the times he craved the touch of his mother, especially after she was gone. And it hurt.  
This time, however, it wasn't like this.

Back then, it had hurt a lot. It still did.  
But now, he felt like he needed it to survive. Like he was going to die from the cold if Thor didn't embrace him.

But Thor wasn't there. And, most importantly, he would never, ever hug him again. Funny how a few weeks ago, that would've been a victory...

Loki escaped the memory, instead focusing on the pain on his leg.

He had already lost count of how many days it had been.  
Dwelling on it now was useless, anyway. Asgard and Midgard, what was the difference? Both places were painful. Living was painful.  
He had no hope for the future.

Loki inhaled from his nose slowly, trying to calm his breathing. It didn't particularly help.

He wanted to sleep, escape this reality, even if just for a few hours, but he was afraid he would lose his other leg if he did.  
So he stayed awake. It was easy now, the pain kept him up.

He barely held back a smirk at the thought; the torturer sure had done their job well. They had taught Loki his lesson.  
He wasn't going to fall alseep without permission ever again....

 

...and then he woke up.

Instead of the cold floor, there was something soft under him, and a blanket covered his body.  
It was warm. It felt so good...

...so different from the dungeons.

Loki sat up, examining his surroundings.  
He was on a bed, in a midgardian room.  
Instead of the towel he had been wearing earlier, he was now dressed in a slightly oversized T-shirt with a stamp of midgardian writing on it, and pajama shorts.  
And under his ankle was... a pillow.

Clothes, a bed, even a blanket... what was all this about? Why was he being treated like some... king or something?  
Well, that was far from an accurate comparison, but it's what came to his mind at the time.  
Was it Jane who...

...oh, no.  
He had fallen asleep without permission. Again.  
Last time he had lost his leg. Now who knows what would happen.

And how he wanted to stay and enjoy that moment of peace, of unexpected, forgotten comfort, and it pained him psychically to have to leave the warmth of that bed, but...  
He was a slave.  
He really had to get up. And then request his punishment.

And so he did, ignoring the pain that consumed his everything the moment he moved.

He easily found his way around the small apartment and back to the living room.  
There, he found Jane sleeping on the couch.  
She must have fallen asleep sometime after he collapsed.  
Now all he could do was wait for her to wake up... and deliver his punishment for fainting.

Many thoughts crossed his still not properly tamed mind; the way she was at the time, Jane was vulnerable. He could easily.....

Loki shook his head in an attempt to rid himself of the thought.  
If anything ever happened to Jane, Thor would find him, and then being a test subject would seem like a luxury. He knew that much.

So he walked next to the couch and kneeled down on the floor, instead. Where he wasn't safe, but at least he was where he was supposed to be.

At least he wasn't doing anything wrong.

Loki's eyes travelled the room to land on the spot where he had thrown up earlier. It looked like Jane had already cleaned it.  
Great.  
Not only had he messed up his mistress' floor, he wasn't even capable of cleaning up after his own mess, giving his mistress work to do. That was the exact opposite of what he was supposed to do, and it couldn't possibly end well.  
Loki was expecting to pay extra for that.

From where he was kneeling, he couldn't tell exactly how much time had passed.  
There was what he recognized to be a midgardian clock on the wall. While he couldn't read the time, judging by how much it had changed as he waited, it must have been quite a while.

Eventually, the sun started to go down. Loki was still there, knees hurting from the pressure he put on them, but not more than the rest of his body.

That's when Jane finally opened her eyes, slowly, taking a moment to take in what was going on around her.

Then she spotted him, who hadn't moved an inch from where he had kneeled.

Jane got up, eyeing him suspiciously.  
"Hey... you're awake," she said.

She stood up and walked towards him, until she was right in front of him, with only a few inches separating them.

Loki's lips parted, but he didn't make any move besides that.

_Here it comes,_ he thought. _More pain..._

"Is there a reason you... keep doing that?" Jane asked, her expression unreadable.  
"P- Pardon?"

His voice came out low and raspy. It didn't sound like him at all.  
Moreover, the nausea that took over him when he spoke was overwhelming, and he could feel each word and breath struggle painfully to get out of his throat.  
But it was nothing he couldn't ignore. At least for now.

"Kneeling, I mean. I don't know if it makes you feel better to sit like this, but putting so much pressure on your knees can't be good for you, with the shape your body's in. Couches are for sitting. Come, get up."

Was this woman for real?  
Was she actually questioning why Loki, her slave, was kneeling in front of her, his mistress?  
For a scientist, she just seemed kind of... dumb. Or was she that uninformed?

It's true that Thor never mentioned the word 'slave'... or 'test subject'... or 'servant', 'punching bag', 'plaything'...  
Could it be she was truly under the impression that she had to look after him? That this whole thing was for his sake, and not hers?  
That was... interesting, at the vesy least.  
If he were to keep it up, and let her believe this, could it possibly work?  
It certainly wouldn't hurt to try. And if it did, it wouldn't hurt any more than it would have if she knew from the start...  
Hopefully.

Just as ordered, Loki stood up.  
He had to test his theory before setting his plan in motion.  
"What can I do for you today, my Mistress?" he asked, avoiding to look her in face directly but at the same time carefully watching her reaction.

Jane hesitated. "Well... I've been wondering a while now... calling me 'Mistress', is that an asgardian thing?"  
Loki did his best not to show any emotion.  
"Yes. Indeed it is."  
It wasn't exactly a lie.  
"Would you like me to call you by something else?" he tried this time.  
"Jane is fine... Call me Jane."

Uh, oh.  
Loki bit his lip. He didn't like where this was heading.  
He had expected for her to say that he can call her 'miss' or 'doctor' or whatever people called her at work.

But for her to allow this much familiarity... even if she had no clue that he was her slave, she obviously wouldn't allow Loki, an enemy, to refer to her so informally. There's no way she had forgotten about his past actions, after all.

Which meant... it had to be a trap. She must've known everything, and she was testing him to see if he would actually call her by just her first name. To see if he was going to keep up the not-a-slave-at-all act.  
Oh, how he had messed up.

But maybe he could still make the punishment less severe if he confessed now and admitted attempting to fool her.  
It was humiliating, and risky, and scary, but it was also his best bet. He couldn't waste that last chance.

"I will not do that, my Mistress..." he muttered. "You do not deserve that."  
"I don't... deserve it?" Jane looked puzzled, but thankfully not offended.

Loki didn't explain, and instead continued, doing what he knew he had to do.

He kneeled back on the floor.  
From where he was, he lowered his head and torso on the floor, hands folded under his forehead, and swallowing his pride, just like he had been taught, apologized;

"Please forgive me. I was a fool for thinking I, a lowly slave, could trick my mistress. I forgot my place and got ahead of myself, and I am truly sorry for what I have done."

None of what he said sounded like him, it was all fake, all things he had had to learn by heart. But in the end, did it actually matter?  
Whether he meant it or not, the outcome was always the same.

"I am aware that I am do not deserve your forgiveness. So I humbly ask that you make me worthy of it; I will be very happy to accept any punishment you may find suitable for my actions."  
Now he had to stop to take a deep breath, this part was the one that always hurt the most;  
"Please, my Mistress... p- punish... me."

Even with his head lowered to touch the floor, he could still feel her gaze on his back. It sent tingles down his spine.  
He wondered what her expression looked like, as she stared down at him.  
Was she smiling? Surprised? Displeased? He wouldn't know. He was looking at the floor, which was more fitting for someone like him.

Yes, he was exactly where he had to be.  
Even that last attempt of his for a better life had failed, but at least everything was back to normal now. He was in the right place.  
That thought was somewhat comforting, at least.

A minute passed, and Jane still hadn't said a thing.  
Was she enjoying the sight that much?

Eventually, Loki heard her shaky voice;  
"A... A slave, you say?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! <3
> 
> This time, I have some questions for you guys! A quick poll for whoever would like to answer it! ^^
> 
> \- Which chapter was your favorite so far (if you have one)?  
> \- Do you want a happy ending, a sad ending, or a bittersweet ending?  
> \- Which of the above endings do you think this work is going to have?  
> \- Do you think this work could do with more 'hurt' or with more 'comfort'?  
> \- And whatever else you guys would like to say here! All comments are deeply appreciated!~
> 
> Have a good day, everyone~


	6. A Chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys!! How's everyone doing? :D
> 
> I wish this chapter was longer, but at least I finished it earlier than normal, so I guess that makes up for it! It's still longer than the first chapter, at least.
> 
> Please enjoy!~ ^^

Jane sat on her heels, lowering herself on Loki's level.

"Calm down," she said, and only then did Loki realize he was trembling. "You haven't eaten in way too long, so you might be a bit..." _Delusional_. "How about having that lunch, and then a... a nice little chat?"

Jane didn't wait for a reply. Not because she wasn't going to accept 'no' as an answer, but because at the time, Loki didn't look like he could even get the two-letter word out.

And truly, no sane person would refuse to eat in this kind of situation.  
Or at least that's what Jane thought, because the way Loki saw it, he had every reason to refuse such an unexpectedly kind offer, if given the choice to.

And at the moment Jane was already partly questioning Loki's sanity, so she decided to put any assumptions to rest for now and focus on what's in front of her, what's certain.  
Which in this case was the fact that Loki was starving, and no matter what he might've said, he had to eat.

She stood up and headed to the kitchen... as if she wanted to get away from there as soon as possible, Loki noted.  
He didn't quite understand what it was that had shaken her so much. By admitting that he was a slave, he had merely stated a fact, and it's not like he ruined any plans she might've had to punish him for his deeds; he was her slave, she could do that any time. She didn't need a reason.  
And the whole take-over-Manhattan business probably served as an all-time reason.  
So where was her problem?

Jane prepared the table hurriedly, but with care.  
Naturally, the spaghetti had grown cold by then, but that was the least of her worries when she had a starving man in her living room.  
Frankly, keeping him from eating even a minute longer than necessary would come off as plain sadistic, at least to her; Loki wouldn't even notice.

"Here you are," Jane muttered, placing a plate of pasta on the table and staring at him expectantly from the kitchen.  
Only then did Loki stand up and hesitantly limp over to where she was, remembering to keep his head low.

When he simply stood by the open door, Jane sighed and instructed him to sit down and eat. And so he did.

Of course he was afraid. Afraid of what might happen to him once he ate, of what Jane could've easily placed in the food. But more than that, he was desperate, so desperate to ease the pain in his empty stomach.  
And it's not like he could disobey a direct order from his mistress...  
So he decided not to think about it. He was tired of thinking.  
For now, he just ate, as his mistress watched in silence...

 

* * *

 

Surprisingly, there wasn't an 'incident' this time. He managed to keep the food down, and although it didn't taste like much, and every time the food met his lips it stang, he still felt a little bit better after a long time.

The pain on his stomach hadn't stopped, but it had calmed considerably, and he felt... _right_. Just a little.  
Hopefully that wasn't a side effect of some kind of drug.

At first Loki was a bit concerned about eating in front of his mistress, but he got over it almost instantly. And before he knew it, the plate was empty.  
The sadness he felt as realization hit him was so intense it was overwhelming. One moment the plate was full, and then it was all gone...

There had to be a reason his mistress had fed him. He didn't have many hopes of it happening when it wasn't absolutely necessary, perhaps for one of her experiments or something like that.  
Despite that, it felt so good that for a moment he thought he could even get used to... to _eating_ again.  
Foolish, wasn't it?

"Done already?" Jane asked, successfully managing to sound calm. "It would be bad for you if you suddenly ate too much after a long time of not eating..."

Jane said that to justify the reason she wouldn't give him any more food, and yet... oh, he looked so hungry, she just couldn't refuse him a little bit more.  
There wasn't much left anyway, she might as well give it to him.

"...but I don't think another serving would actually hurt... How about it?"

Loki stared as if he hadn't understood the question. Jane was about to sigh, but she stopped herself; she had noticed by then that any reaction that could be mistaken for displeasure had been misunderstood by Loki, so she wanted to play it safe. She kept on a blank expression instead.

"Look, I'm just gonna put some more," she picked up the plate, "and you can eat it, or leave it. It's up to you."

Loki eyed the newly filled plate suspiciously, but did his best not to let his hesitance show.  
If his mistress wanted him to have more, for whatever reason... then he'd better have it, he decided.

Eating had never made him feel this much joy before. Such a great feeling...  
But he was aware it was too good to have no consequences.  
He still tried not to think about that, for just a while longer...

Everything had consequences. Even existing, even breathing apparently had consequences. So what difference did it make?  
He might as well live in the moment, just this once, enjoy the calm before the storm.

Even after the second serving, Loki still didn't feel quite full, and what he felt was strange above all, but it wasn't exactly an unpleasant feeling.

Jane placed his once more empty plate in the sink, looking at him somewhat apologetically as she took it away.

Loki wondered whether he should offer to wash it along with the other dishes that sat there, but he decided not to say anything; he was more or less expecting to get orders now, since he had eaten and all.

He didn't know what Jane was going to do, or why that thing required him to be full, but he wanted to believe he was mentally prepared for pretty much anything it could possibly be.  
So he waited for her to speak, doing his best to hide his nervousness.

Instead of saying anything, Jane walked to the sink and filled a glass of water. Then, she took a small box from one of the kitchen drawers, brought out a round, white pill, and let it fall in the water.  
The pill melted instantly as if it was made of sugar and spread in the water, turning it white.

Jane offered the glass to Loki, who didn't know if this was merely how midgardians liked their water, or if a sip would send him straight to the other world.  
At this point he thought he would be a little disappointed if it wasn't the latter.

"A painkiller, as promised," Jane told him.

That word again. Loki could remember her mentioning it earlier, but he still had no clue what it meant.

"It's not a very pleasant taste, but it'll help. I promise," she continued, still holding the glass.

This time, Loki took it from her hands, carefully, knowing it wouldn't be good to make her wait any longer.  
He brought it to his lips, closed his eyes in an attempt to calm his nerves, and started drinking.

...  
... _bitter_.  
So bitter. Too bitter. Awful.

Nevertheless, he finished it in less than five seconds.  
After all, wasting time never made things better, it just brought about more trouble. He knew that better than anyone.

And, in the end, it's not like he cherished his life, or that very limited 'freedom' of his (in other words, the fact that he was still allowed to move around, unbound), enough to get out of his way to experience it for a moment longer.

After all, not only did he not have a say in the matter to begin with, but he had already drank it all.  
If he collapsed and woke up on a metal table, and then got tortured or experimented on, or even if he never woke up... that was already out of his hands.  
And so he did his best to convince himself he didn't care.

Jane took back the glass and placed it on the sink, together with his empty plate.  
Loki now wished he had tried his luck with asking to wash the dishes earlier, he would've bought some time for himself if he had at least done that....

...no. No, he didn't care. He was calm. He was fine. Everything was fine. He had to breathe...

"Alright, so..." Jane began, "I'd like to talk for a while, if that's okay with you."

So an interrogation was up next...  
Loki held his breath.

It really wasn't like him to be afraid of this kind of thing.  
Then again, none of this was 'like him'. Showing submission so readily wasn't like him, visibly trembling wasn't like him.  
One more thing to add to the pile wasn't much.

"Yes, Mistress," he muttered, so far successfully retaining his composure.

The two went back to the living room, where Jane sat on one couch, gesturing for Loki to sit down on the other one on her left, and they both turned so they were facing each other.

"So, back in Asgard..." Jane started, her words instantly sending a chill down Loki's spine, "you were... sentenced, right?"  
"That is correct," Loki replied quickly.  
"Can you tell me what your sentence is, exactly?"

Loki reluctantly allowed his mind to travel back to the events of that day.  
He could almost hear Thor and Odin's exchange as it played in his mind, words echoing for a moment before fading, then repeating.

Suddenly, he was fully aware of the wounds left on his lips, a pain he had only finally managed to forget about.  
Even though he could speak now, the helplessness of not being able to was back, once more suffocating him mercilessly.

"I... I am to be..." He hesitated.

He didn't know what was going on. Did Jane really not know the answer already? Then, a little while earlier, what was all that about?

Either way, he'd run out of ideas... He was tired of tricks.

"I am to be your slave and test subject," he confessed, "for until..."

Would it be considered rude mentioning his mistress' inevitable and, according to him, approaching death?  
A slave is supposed to make their master appear superior in every way. Implying he was certain to outlive her, although true, it sounded improper...  
He decided not to risk it.

"...for some time..." he eventually said.  
It wasn't exactly a lie.

Loki looked at Jane, observing her reaction.  
She wasn't moving. Her cheeks had turned pale, and her lips were pressed together to form a flat line.

"And... And the... wounds..." she whispered, voice low and weak.  
Her eyes travelled on all the spots she remembered to be the most badly hurt, from when she saw him earlier.  
"Who did that to you...?"

Thankfully, Loki already had an answer ready, one that he was actually quite pleased with;  
"Those were merely the necessary preparations for my new purpose," he stated, now surprisingly calm. "I do hope they do not hinder your plans for me."

Jane blinked. Had she heard that correct?

That was... Loki, right?

Because the way she remembered him, Loki... he was arrogant, controlling, ruthless; an evil villain with no sympathy. He had claimed the lives of many and had attempted to hurt her loved ones again and again...

Broken, helpless, he deserved to feel like this.  
And yet...

"Did Thor... know about this...?"  
"Hmm? Oh, yes, he was strongly involved in how this decision was taken," Loki replied, thinking he is complimenting his ex-brother in his lover's eyes.  
"I see..."

There was a moment of silence, before Jane spoke again;  
"Look, Loki..."

_You are not my slave. I don't want you to be._  
_You don't have to call me 'mistress' or do as I say._

She wanted to say that, and yet the words wouldn't come out.

Loki really didn't seem in a state to hurt anyone.  
He looked completely harmless, covered in bandages and in a cotton T-shirt that Erik had forgotten last time he came over to Jane's apartment.

But his current appearance wasn't enough to cloud her memories; Jane still hadn't forgotten what he had done.

What if she told him what was in her mind, and then Loki used his freedom under her 'custody' to harm more people?  
It would be her fault. Thor had put her in charge, and so she was fully responsible for his actions.

She just couldn't do it. She couldn't tell him that he didn't have to be her slave, no matter how pitiful he was, no matter how much it hurt her to be the reason he looked so broken.  
She had to keep this up, for just until Thor returned to get him back...

It couldn't possibly take that long, could it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah, Jane still has no idea she's stuck with Loki for the rest of her life. *shrugs* Ah, well.
> 
> To be honest, I'm quite pleased with how things turned out in this chap, because even if Jane knows everything now, the misunderstandings still don't have to stop. Yay. >:3
> 
> Please let me know your thoughts!!~ The number of people who comment regularly seems to increase, and so does my excitement every time I post a new chapter! Thank you all so much!! I love you guys!! <3 <3


	7. A Responsibility

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys!! <3  
> Sorry for not updating for so long. I've been kinda busy lately... But at least this chapter is done now!
> 
> Thank you for staying with me for chapter 7!

Jane sighed.  
"...I am tired. I would like some time to think..."

She looked at the clock on the wall.  
Roughly ten hours had passed ever since Thor visited her apartment, left this huge mess in her hands and disappeared just as suddenly as he came.

She couldn't deal with this. Not right now.

"It's already gotten dark. How about we both get some more sleep and see what we can do about this in the morning?"

Loki nodded slowly.  
He could really use some extra sleep, be it on a bed, the floor, or a bunch of hot coals.

"Yes, Mistress. Thank you, Mistress."  
Loki bowed slightly.

"Oh, about that..." Jane continued, "Don't..."

_Don't call me 'mistress'._

But if not that, then what? Dr. Foster? Or just Jane? Those didn't sound very slave-like on Loki's part, did they now?

"...nevermind."

Jane got up from the couch. "I'll have to buy some clothes for you to wear around the house and proper pajamas..." she said, mostly to herself. "Until then, what you've already on should do... It's all I have that fits you. And about your room..."

_Do slaves have rooms?_

What is being an asgardian slave like in the first place?  
Do they let them bathe with cold water when at all, feed them crumbs just to keep them alive, and whip them when they do something wrong?

Remembering how Loki was dirty, starved and covered in welts by the time Thor brought him on Earth, Jane knew that, sadly, she must've been spot on.

She wanted to be a convincing mistress, she really did.  
Naturally, she wasn't going to whip and starve him, but she could at least try to treat him a bit roughly. Or at the very least, make him think he is being treated roughly.

But now that the image of this man on her doorstep, broken, not daring to look her in the eyes, was back in her mind, she just couldn't do it. She couldn't let him sleep on the floor, or even a couch. Not in his state.

In fact, there was only one place where she could let him stay at and not hate herself for it. The same place where she'd put him when he collapsed earlier.

Her room.

"You'll be staying at the spare room I have for visitors," she lied, turning her eyes around to eventually land them on the floor -which, coincidentally enough, also seemed to be Loki's favorite spot to rest his gaze on ever since returning from Asgard.  
"Just because I am very busy and need to make full use of all the other rooms, including the living room. And that's final."

That must've sounded pretty mean, as if she didn't care about his well-being at all.  
Good.

So, where was she going to sleep? On the couch, of course.  
Truth be told, she was more used to falling asleep there or on a table while working than on her own bed.  
She really didn't mind giving him the bed for as long as he stayed with her. He was the injured one.

Loki nodded, knowing he should feel at least a little displeased -being a former prince and all- but he was actually glad he was getting a room at all.  
The torturers had done some fine work changing the way he thought, it seemed. He was willing to acknowledge that.

"Yes, Mistress."

Ever since his arrival, those two words were pretty much all Jane got from him. It was driving her insane, how she couldn't just tell him to stop.

"Come this way," Jane ordered. Loki followed behind her.

They walked down a not very long corridor and got to a door at the end of it. "This," Jane began, gesturing towards the door, "is the bathroom. Unless it's a real emergency, I would like for you to let me know when you're going in."

This was mostly because, while Jane was planning to take away the keys from all the rooms so that Loki couldn't lock himself in, she really wanted to avoid walking in on him naked again.

"Yes, Mistress."

Once Jane was done making clear what parts of the bathroom were off-limits and that he was to shower often -she was going to be flexible on that one, however, because she knew it must hurt a lot- they moved on to Jane's room.

"You'll be staying here," Jane explained. "The sheets are clean, nobody's used them except for you, so feel free to use the bed. I've only two rules for this room; don't touch anything unnecessarily, and behave in general. I might have to spend time in here sometime in the future, in that case you'll have to bear with me. That is pretty much all for now... any questions?"

"Just one, Mistress..."  
Jane stared intensely at that, unable to hide her impatience.

Truth is, Loki didn't know if he should say this or not, as it could be easily used against him, but keeping it in now wouldn't do him any good either. So he went ahead and said it;  
"I... would like to request permission to use the bathroom."

Jane was the one who had told him he was supposed to tell her before going. She didn't think it would make her feel so awful...

But part of it was probably the way he phrased it.  
_Request permission._ All she wanted was to know when he was going in...  
It's not like she was going to keep him from going or anything, and it made her slightly restless, the fact that he had thought that.

Once again, Jane couldn't help but wonder... was she doing the right thing?

"Ah, yes, of course..." she replied, rather flustered more than anything. "Uh, just... shout if you need anything..."  
_Ah, shit, no, he can't speak!_  
_...no, wait, he can. I removed the thread. He can speak..._

Jane placed a palm on her forehead. Her thoughts were a mess.

"A- Anything else...?" she mumbled, clearly distressed.

"No, Mistress. Thank you, Mistress," Loki responded, although his words were starting to sound more like a recorded message to Jane by now.

Jane sighed, turning away. "Sure, whatever..."  
And with that, she walked away, leaving Loki alone in his new room.

Loki used the bathroom as quickly as possible (he had used a midgardian toilet before, so thankfully he managed to not mess anything up), washed his hands like Jane had specifically instructed him to, then went straight back to the room Jane had given him.

Both went to sleep right away, exhausted from spending all of their waking hours worrying over every little thing.

Shortly before he slipped into unconsciousness, Loki found his head and limbs didn't hurt as much anymore...

 

* * *

 

Jane woke up first. She wasn't too surprised to find it was already morning.  
The first thing she did was give a light knock on Loki's door and quietly call out to him.  
When he didn't reply, she warned she was going in (again, doing her best to avoid another awkward encounter, as she found herself apparently experiencing a déjà vu) and opened the door.

After she confirmed that Loki was still asleep, Jane returned to the living room, closing the door behind her.

She had some time alone after a long day and, frankly, didn't know what to do with herself. Loki had come back into her life only just yesterday after quite a while of conveniently not having to deal with him, and yet she felt like it had been weeks since the last time she got to be alone with her thoughts.  
It wasn't exactly as comforting as she had expected it; nothing was over, and when she had so much free time, all she could do was worry over it.

She had to find something to distract herself with. Something that took a lot of hard work, something that wouldn't leave her the time or energy to worry about other things.  
And miraculously, she knew just the thing!

She had promised Darcy a birthday surprise, hadn't she?  
It had to be an object, since she had claimed to have hid it in her bathroom. She already had an idea of what it could be.

Roughly six months ago, Darcy wouldn't stop bugging her about creating a -rather silly, according to Jane- device she had thought about.  
The idea was that it would be a pair of mechanical glasses that filtered colors and replaced them with others, and they could be customized to match the user's preferences.

Darcy insisted that it wouldn't be just fun, but also helpful for deciding what to wear, how to decorate a room and whatnot.  
She'd also said it would be hella awesome to go for a walk outside in a world where the sky is pink and the grass yellow.

Although Jane couldn't exactly argue with that last one, she ended up never actually making the glasses.  
Which was great, because she could make them now!  
And hopefully with that she could make it up to her for what had happened the last time she saw Darcy.

As she started drawing plans for the device, Jane could already feel a weight being lifted off her shoulders.

She didn't take any breaks in between. Once she was done designing them, she started working on the glasses' frame and had made a lot of progress by the time Loki woke up.  
Although at some point she was going to need equipment that she didn't have at her place at the time, she was positive she was going to finish before the week was over.

Since it was still early by the time she finally stopped to take a break, Jane decided to make breakfast. She also figured Loki could wake up any moment, assuming he wasn't already awake.

So once she finished preparing breakfast, Jane went to check on him again; perhaps he was awake and just hesitated to come out of the room. Or maybe he'd collapsed again...  
She hoped the former was the case.

Again, she knocked on his door and called out to him.  
And oddly enough, she felt very relieved when this time he actually replied.

"Y- Yes?"

It was low and hesitant, but she didn't mind. As long as they could communicate at last. Well, somewhat.

"Can I come in?" Jane asked. "If you need to prepare in any way before I enter, just tell me," she then added.

"No, please, come in."

Jane took a deep breath before opening the door.

She'd expected to find Loki seated on the bed, being injured and all, but he was just standing there, completely still.  
She felt like he was going to fall heavily on his knees any moment, just like he had already done more than just once ever since coming to her apartment, so she tried not to make any sudden moves that could startle him.  
Just like him, she just stood there, staring back.

There was a moment of silence. Then, Loki opened his mouth, about to apologize for not only oversleeping, but also not presenting himself, as he now guessed he should've done.  
Luckily, Jane cut him off before he could say anything;

"How... How about breakfast?" she said, showing him a small smile.

While Loki had already thought of countless things Jane could've possibly said next, asking to give him food was, frankly, not one of them.

To be offered food again, and so soon, it was... rather suspicious, more than anything else.

Yesterday, he had guessed that he would probably need the energy for something in relation to her project.  
But nothing had happened, he was sent to his room without assisting the scientist in making any progress at all with whatever it was she was planning.

Was she feeding him on a whim, then? Because she felt like it?  
That was pointless and utterly unreasonable, and Jane didn't appear to be an unreasonable woman. Or so Loki had thought, the first time he met her.  
Now, after receiving this kind of treatment, he just wasn't so sure anymore.

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't find a reason she could be doing this.  
But why would she do it if it didn't benefit her in any way?

Trying to win his trust, maybe?  
That was foolish. Why would she ever hope to accomplish that under their current circumstances?  
Loki wasn't at his best, but he hadn't gone insane yet. He had no plans of lowering his guard around her.  
But if it wasn't that, then what?

Surely his bony frame wasn't that unsightly, for her to waste food on him?

It was driving him mad, trying to understand her.  
Still. He had been offered a meal.

"If that is an order," Loki finally replied.  
Jane sighed loudly. "It's not, Loki, it's not-"  
...is not what a mistress would say. She paused.  
"You know what. Just eat it, I'm... I'm not in the mood for this right now," she eventually mumbled, slightly lost. "Uh... do you think your stomach can take it?"  
"I believe so."  
"Alright then. Follow me."

They headed to the kitchen. Loki had already become quite familiar with this tiny apartment of hers that was nothing like his chambers back in Asgard.

Jane had fried four eggs for them to share, since she'd thought something easy to digest would be best for Loki at the time.  
She set the table, and they both sat down. Jane started eating first, to show Loki it was okay to start whenever he was ready.

Loki didn't seem to recognize the dish in front of him, but he didn't hesitate to taste it, perhaps afraid it was going to offend his mistress. He picked up the silverware almost immediately after Jane did and began eating -very neatly, Jane noted, just as expected of a former prince.

Jane couldn't tell if he liked the taste of it or not, because his every move was carefully planned and showed not even the slightest bit of emotion.  
But Jane knew she probably shouldn't be surprised he wasn't being picky about his food, after everything he had gone through.

After they both finished eating, Jane changed Loki's bandages and, before going back to work, decided to give him something to do. Something easy and simple, just to keep the idea of him being in her service in his mind.

"Here are your orders for today." Oh, she had never expected that saying those words would leave such a bad taste in her mouth.

She was practically playing with his head, letting him believe he was in a truly terrifying situation when he actually was not. Well, he was a slave, sure, but not a test subject, and he never would be if Jane could do something about it.  
And yet she said nothing. She was doing something utterly horrible to him, wasn't she?  
Reminding herself just who he was didn't help at all.

Loki immediately looked up from the spot on the floor he had conveniently fixed his eyes on, and Jane could almost hear his increasing heart rate.  
She felt regret take over her; she should've phrased that differently. How horrible.

"Firstly, I need you to..."  
Something easy that wouldn't cause him any physical or emotional pain...  
"The dishes." She pointed at the sink, where the plates they'd eaten their breakfast on had been placed. "I need you to wash the dishes. Can you do that?"

Loki didn't know if he actually could. What he did know was that there's no 'can' or 'can't' when it came to slaves, only 'did not try hard enough'. So he still nodded.

"Good."  
Would it be too much to add more chores for him to do? Well, she had already began her sentence with 'firstly', so something had to follow.  
"Then, after you are done, I want you to..."

...a test subject, he said?  
Jane could recall Thor mentioning at some point that Loki is quite fond of chocolate.  
The gears in her mind began to turn. She could work with this; make Loki think he is being treated as a test subject, and make up for the pain she was causing him at the same time -plus get rid of the guilt. A win-win.

"There's something I want you to try."  
Loki stared in confusion.  
"Food, that is. It's not anything dangerous," she assured him, "but it has a slight chance of causing mild nausea."  
A lie. She was getting good at this, wasn't she?  
Jane didn't know if she should be proud or concerned.  
"So I want you to try it first. Got it?"

Loki nodded silently. He could deal with nausea, after all he spent most of his waking hours constantly plagued by it.  
That was nothing.

"Good," and she started looking for her old recipe book, from back when she used to cook as a hobby.

She felt a bit childish, with her plan to make it up to Loki in this way, especially considering he had committed all those crimes against her people.  
But that wouldn't stop her from making the most delicious chocolate cake Loki could ever hope of tasting.

Somehow, the thought that he probably wouldn't get to eat it ever again after returning to prison gave her an odd sense of responsibility.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there was that tumblr post about how in the novelization of Thor: Ragnarok, Loki doesn't believe in chocolate fountains, because something so good obviously cannot be real (man, same). I liked the idea so I just put it in there. :3
> 
> Do you guys think this story is progressing too slowly? I think it kind of does... Thankfully I've some things planned for the next chaps that will spice things up a little (I hope).
> 
> So this chapter was mostly guilt, food, more guilt, and then chocolate... so yeah, guilt and food. Nice.
> 
> Let me know your thoughts! See you guys on the next chapter. ^^


	8. A Little Bit Of Time Spent Alone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! <3  
> Sorry for the long wait, I've been on a little writer's block lately... But hey, this chapter's got some action! Some action at long last! :'D
> 
> I was going to write more on this chapter, but it's already been a month since my last update, and I got sick so I can't think clearly enough to write any more today... I barely survived editing the whole thing. :P
> 
> Please enjoy~

Jane was conflicted.  
Would it really be okay if she were to leave Loki all alone and go do some shopping at the market?

She hadn't left her house ever since the god came along. She felt much safer having him around rather than somewhere she couldn't see.  
But she clearly couldn't keep this up forever; she had to leave eventually, both because of work and her personal needs, and she had already decided that she couldn't take Loki out of the house no matter what. Staying inside and starving to death also wasn't an option.

So she decided it had to be today, the day she left him home alone for the first time.

She wasn't going to risk being away for whole hours just yet, or at all if possible, but she knew the time when she'd have to do that as well would eventually come, one day.  
For now, though, she didn't want to be absent for any more than half an hour, not until she had made sure that Loki wasn't reckless enough to try anything stupid while she wasn't there.

"I have to leave for a while. You can get to work as if I never left, but unfortunately, I will have to lock you in the kitchen while I'm away. And it depends on how you behave today whether you will also be bound whenever I'm gone in the future."

Would that really be okay? Her instincts told her to tie him up, to only leave once he's been completely immobilized (he was a criminal, after all, a criminal in her home), but her mind told her that she wouldn't be able to do it.  
In fact, she was still scared he would snap if she went too far or denied him certain freedom.

It was gonna be okay, Jane promised herself. The only way to escape her kitchen would be by breaking a window, which would be hard if not impossible for Loki in his weakened state. And then, her apartment was on a high enough floor for him to get seriously injured, should he go as far as to jump.

And lastly, say he managed to make it out of her apartment unharmed; where would he go?  
If a single person recognized him, which was more than likely since he'd spent quite a while doing evil live on TV not too long ago, it would be game over.

After telling all that to herself, Jane finally felt that confining him in one room was more than enough.  
In the end, he really was powerless.

On the other hand, Loki viewed things quite differently; was Jane really going to trust him enough to leave him alone in her house?  
What if he started a fire? What if he deliberately hurt himself, her property?

He could only imagine what would happen to him if he messed up, or if he gave her the idea he'd tried to escape while she was gone.  
She had already forgiven (or perhaps, temporarily ignored) countless mistakes on his part. In fact, he had trouble recalling even just one time when he'd done exactly what his mistress had ordered without failing, misunderstanding her orders, or both.  
He knew he shouldn't push his luck by making more foolish mistakes.

 

* * *

 

Jane changed her clothes, spent five minutes or so in the bathroom, then took her bag, cellphone and wallet.  
And with one last warning, she was gone.

Outside, the streets were nearly empty. It was an ideal day to take the car, and it would make things much faster, which was particularly important now.  
However, as Jane took her seat in front of the wheel, she was reminded that it was out of fuel since the day before yesterday.

Having no alternative, Jane walked to the market. It didn't take her too long to arrive, and ten minutes later she was already out, carrying four plastic bags.  
Bandages, food, men's shampoo, the ingredients for chocolate cake, more painkillers... she'd even bought some clothes for Loki. You can't expect to find quality clothing in a market, Jane knew that, but they would do for now.  
Anything would do for now.

Jane walked down the familiar street. She was only a couple blocks away now.  
Her attention was fully focused on the heavy bags hanging from her wrists a little painfully, so she didn't even notice the man who kept getting closer behind her. And when she did, it was too late.

It did take her a while to comprehend the situation.  
She could remember being forced to stop in her tracks by something or someone behind her. Looking down to find there was a knife firmly held in front of her throat.  
Maybe it was touching her skin, maybe it wasn't, but she could've sworn she felt the cold blade against her throat.

No other people on sight, not a single moving car on the road. Everything was quiet, save for the loud pounding in her ears as she fought the urge to flinch away.  
Jane gulped, either feeling the blade touch her as she did, or imagining it.

But once she got over that first shock, she found she wasn't that scared.  
She'd been through much, much worse; hadn't she, now?

"J- Just... take everything and go." Jane's breathing was heavy as she began negotiating; definitely audible to the stranger.  
However, it calmed as she kept speaking. "I haven't seen your face. Take the bags and my money and leave."

Jane felt the man's hand move behind her and she tried to stay as still as possible.  
He took the plastic bags out of her hands, first one hand, then the other, and put them on the ground. Then he took her own bag, with her wallet and other belongings. The hand with the knife never moved, keeping it fixed not an inch away from her throat.

But even once he had taken everything, the man did not move away.  
A few moments passed in silence, and then, Jane felt the stranger's rough hand on her hip.  
That's when she lost control of herself and kicked him on the stomach with her heel.

She heard his muffled cry, then his coughing a few times.  
By the time she turned around, he was already on his feet and approaching her menacingly, knife in hand.

And then, he stabbed her.

 

* * *

 

Although it had been over half an hour, Loki had barely finished doing half the dishes on the sink.  
There was dish soap everywhere, including on his clothes, and water was constantly dripping down his elbows and on the floor.

Well, that just meant more cleaning for him to do later. No big deal.

Loki looked out the window.  
Too high up. Good. That way he wouldn't get strange thoughts.

Sighing, he turned his gaze back to the dishes.  
So many left. His mistress could be back any moment now.  
Would she be mad?

Actually, now that he thought about it... perhaps it was because he was locked up, with no way of telling the time -again- but... wasn't she late?

 

* * *

 

Jane lay on the street, right hand applying pressure on her bloody shoulder.  
Pain was painted all over her sweating face as she tried to even out her breathing. Knowing she was still in danger, she gave herself five seconds to get over the shock. Then, she huffed and got up, staggering.

The stranger had his back turned against her, busy looking through her groceries.  
Jane's hand moved to her belt, slowly, where she knew she always carried her taser.

The man didn't even see it coming as he found himself wiggling on the ground, in a kind of pain he was unfamiliar with until now.

Picking up her bag, Jane grabbed her cellphone and began dialing an emergency number. She stopped halfway.

Her wound looked deep. It was bleeding a lot, too.  
And Loki was still locked in the kitchen.  
What if they kept her at the hospital? Knowing the idiot, he would starve himself until she returned. Nevermind that, who knows what his reaction would be when she didn't show up today?  
He couldn't do much, that's true, but confining him in a room for this long, she was certain he would freak out.

Not to mention the attention the whole thing would gather.  
Surely, two days after her return home, she'd start getting visitors from S.H.I.E.L.D. asking about the incident.  
They wouldn't get to ask much, of course, because they'd be busy arresting her for hiding a criminal in her home, and perhaps for also practising slavery on the twenty-first century.  
She couldn't afford having S.H.I.E.L.D. agents in her home, not right now.

Jane looked around her; she was only two blocks away from her house.  
Ever since Loki arrived, she had had to take care of so many serious wounds. She could deal with her own.

Instead of calling someone, Jane opened her phone camera. After turning the man on his back, using the tip of her shoe as to not leave any prints, she snapped multiple pictures of him.  
Then she picked up her bag and the most important groceries -food, bandages and painkillers, leaving everything else behind- and began heading towards her house.

 

* * *

 

 

Loki almost flinched when he heard the door open, followed by a loud thud, as if something or someone collapsed on the floor. A few moments later, he heard the sound of the door closing again.  
He abandoned the dishes and moved towards the kitchen door, listening closer.

There was some shuffling coming from the other side, the sound of a person's footsteps as they moved around, and what sounded like someone ripping open a plastic package.  
And heavy breathing.

"Ugh... Loooki?!"  
The voice came from behind the door. His mistress' voice.  
She sounded tired, a little annoyed... and in pain.

It was as if the voice got stuck in his throat. For a brief moment, he felt like his lips were still sewn shut, and he was now fully conscious of the wounds left on them.

"Y- Yes?!" He struggled to shout, to be heard over the barrier separating them that was a locked door. "M- Mistress?!"

He heard Jane exhale in something that was probably relief. She didn't say anything else.

Loki looked back at the sink, still filled with dirty dishes.

 

* * *

 

Around five minutes later, Loki, who had gone back to the work he had been assigned to do after not being addressed by his mistress again, heard the sound of the kitchen door being unlocked.  
He turned around to see Jane stepping inside. Only, the sight wasn't quite like what he'd expected.

Jane's face and hands and clothes, all were dirty, covered in mud, and she supported herself with great effort by leaning on the wall.  
More importantly, her shirt was ripped on the shoulder, and the skin under it was covered in bloody bandages, poorly wrapped in her hurry.

"M- Mistress?"

Jane barely raised her gaze to look at him. She tried to call his name, but she felt too weak to even make a sound.

Everything around her began to spin. What was it she came in the kitchen for, again?

Oh, that's right. To make sure Loki was let out of the small room.  
The door was unlocked now, he should be fine... so that meant it was okay for her to finally sleep, right?

Just as Jane began to lose control of her thoughts, her eyes were drawn to the ceiling by an invisible force and the world around her was enveloped in darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I mentioned I had an idea to spice up this chapter, this is not what I had in mind. I literally had none of this in mind. This chapter just took some very unexpected turn on its own while I was writing it.  
> Which is good, because thanks to that I've already got material for the next one! But yeah, not writing another word today. My whole body hurts, I'm going back to sleep. :')
> 
> Thank you for reading!~ Let an exhausted gal know your thoughts! :D


	9. A Different Situation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone still alive? Mayday!
> 
> Hi everyone! :D Nope, I'm not dead! How have you all been?
> 
> I'm really sorry for the long wait! My fandoms come and go, and lately I haven't been really into Marvel, so I couldn't find the motivation to write...  
> Thank you for sticking with me nonetheless! <3
> 
> So. I would have liked for this to be longer, what with the four months wait and all, but clearly I'm not patient enough for this. xD
> 
>  
> 
> There's more of Darcy in this chap! And guess what uhhh she's got a taser :/

_A strange feeling..._  
  
Jane blinked. The room was spinning before her eyes.  
Was she... being carried? No... dragged?  
  
Just a moment later, she found she couldn't move. And there was this unpleasant feeling.  
It was pain, yes, and it was certainly due to the fact that -oh, she remembered now!- she had been stabbed, but what she felt was very much unlike any kind of pain she had felt before; it was a fire that burned her shoulder, slowly spreading to the rest of her body like spilled milk on the kitchen floor.  
  
 _Oh. It stopped._  
  
Jane closed her eyes again. Even keeping them open took a lot of energy.  
All she knew was that she was not being moved anymore.  
The next time she opened them, everything was still blurry, but she could make out the white ceiling of her apartment as she stared straight ahead, not having the strength to look anywhere else.  
She felt for her surroundings and found something soft under her body. A bed, perhaps, or a couch; she felt to numb to tell which one.  
How did she get there?  
  
Her eyelids felt heavy. Once again, suddenly and without giving her the time to comprehend what was going on, everything went dark.  
  
Despite that, she was still somewhat conscious. There was some distant buzzing in her ears. After a while, the noise cleared and turned into voices.  
One voice, in fact, but she could tell the person was talking to somebody.  
  
In her daze, Jane managed to catch a few fragments of the seemingly one-sided conversation:  
  
 _"I swear, this is not a trap."_  
  
 _"I haven't done anything to her."_  
  
 _"I don't know."_  
  
 _"I am certain there was a reason you had not been aware of it until now."_  
  
 _"She's alive. But she's unconscious."_  
  
 _"Please."_  
  
The voice died out a while later. Jane's mind had already wandered off long before it did.  
The realization came to her suddenly; a phone call. The person, whoever it was, had been talking on the phone.  
She didn't really know what to do now that she'd figured it out, but this small piece of information alone felt overwhelmingly important to the paralyzed woman.  
  
She fell asleep shortly after.

 

* * *

 

 

Having the control of his body and movements taken away was not just uncomfortable; it was completely unnecessary. Loki would never make any move against his mistress, or anyone for that matter, not if the only thing that he would achieve by it was cause himself even more suffering.  
And yet, the odd girl from before -Darcy, was it?- wouldn't calm down unless everything was in her control.  
In this kind of situation, Loki couldn't blame her, but still...  
  
After opening the apartment's main door to let her in, though he was surprised, he didn't fight back when she neared him with hurried, menacing steps, and pushed the object in her hand against his torso.  
It hurt, but it was nothing he could not handle, and he was aware of that; it was his first thought when the pain hit him.  
He collapsed.  
  
He let Darcy do as she pleased; didn't struggle, even made it easier for her to move him around -which wasn't as hard for her as it would've been; the man was all skin and bone- to finally lock him up inside -you found it- the bathroom.  
  
Nothing had prepared him for the change in atmosphere when less than a minute later she returned, tasered him again, moved him out of the bathroom to simply abandon him on the floor, lying there paralyzed as he was, finished her business in the bathroom, returned, tasered him again to be sure, dragged him back in, then locked the door.  
  
A grave situation turned comical in the hands of this woman. Loki was honestly kind of amazed.  
  
After all this, the former God of Mischief now sat on the edge of a bathtub, having no idea what is going on outside, if Jane was doing okay, if her friend had given everything away about him...  
  
Earlier, he had made it very clear to Darcy that if she were to tell somebody about him, the one in trouble wouldn't be Loki alone, but also Jane. Only then did Darcy seem to hesitate during the call.  
  
She'd also stropped throwing threats at him from that moment on, while before that, all of her replies consisted of those; describing to him in great detail all the consequences of hurting her friend.  
  
Still, he couldn't be sure she hadn't told anybody of his whereabouts. She appeared to be an impulsive woman, who spoke without thinking first.  
Perhaps somebody was heading there right now; maybe they were already outside, waiting for the right moment to storm the apartment.  
The mere thought sent chills down his spine. If something like this were to happen, it would be the end of him.  
  
And yet, a long time passed, and nobody came. Not only did agents not kick down his door, coming in to take him away and torture him in some dark basement; nobody did. Nobody came.  
  
It had been, what, two hours? No, it was certainly much longer, though he was trying to convince himself it only felt like it because he had been alone with nothing to do.  
He used to not mind, spending countless hours alone, thinking. But after so many days of constant torture, the peace only felt temporary and _wrong_. As if something bad was about to happen any moment.  
  
Outside his door, not a sound; deep silence, like it had been for hours now.  
Had Darcy left? Perhaps left him to starve in there?  
Oh, he knew he had to stop that thought from popping up every single time. Not everyone on this planet wanted to starve him to death. Probably.  
Well, there was Jane, at least, who fed him and didn't let him be hungry.  
She could have. She hadn't. That must've meant something.  
He wanted it to mean something.  
Even if that something was mere proof she was going to keep him alive. That was... well, _something_.  
  
Eventually, he fell asleep. It had been many hours since he last saw Darcy. Or Jane.  
He hoped she was doing okay...

 

* * *

 

Loki woke up to a light tapping, his body sore from the odd position he had fallen asleep in.  
Darcy was tapping her nails against the other side of his door impatiently.  
  
"Hey. Are you dead or what?" she said harshly. Then, in a slightly softer tone that Loki might as well have imagined, added; "I brought you food."  
  
Loki considered his options, finally deciding that a small amount of pain that would eventually fade was worth easing his hunger, and so he decided to speak.  
  
"Lady Darcy..." he started, not knowing how else to address her, or what else to say.  
"Woah, chill. I have a boyfriend," she said as she unlocked the door, in a tone that made it hard to tell whether she was joking.  
"Well," she continued, "–had. I broke up with him." Darcy sighed, seemingly forgetting all about the danger of being around Loki. "Again."  
  
It was hard for Loki to bring himself to focus on anything other than the plate that Darcy swung around for emphasis as she described with great detail her relationship with some Ivan guy and apparently every single one of their issues.  
  
It wasn't working, she said, then with an emphasized "but!" proceeded to explain why it could and would, in fact, work. This whole process was repeated more than once before she finally placed the plate on the cabinet.  
The woman was either very clumsy or straight up did not care, because she didn't even look down when a portion of the food, poorly handled in her hands, escaped the plate and ended up on the cabinet.  
Certainly it was a small portion, but Loki would mourn the loss all the same. He had learned to treasure even the tiniest quantity of food.  
  
Now that she had put the food down and his being fed miraculously no longer depended solely on Darcy's whims, at least not for another twelve hours or so, -that long he could last- Loki felt like being a bit reckless by speaking out of turn.  
Frankly, he doubted that the agonizingly talkative woman would even think of punishing him for asking her a question. In fact, he was currently more afraid that she would eventually find a way to connect the subject to her relationship status, and Loki would be met once again with a grave dilemma: sit quietly and listen for another hour, or attempt homicide.  
He was a little rusty when it came to the latter, but he was confident he could pull it off if it became a real emergency.  
  
He paused, phrased his question properly in his head.  
"How is my mistress? Is she doing well?"  
  
Darcy narrowed her eyes at his words, and Loki could almost hear the gears turning in her head. He hurried to regret ever asking, but then the woman opened her mouth to speak and he decided it was far too late for regrets.  
  
"She is getting better," was all she said. She turned to leave just as Loki let out a shaky sigh of relief, and Darcy, being far more tense than she would ever admit, paused and turned around. "What?"  
  
Loki felt momentarily threatened. "Nothing?" he blurted out, and it came out as a question.  
  
Darcy raised an eyebrow and looked at him rather suspiciously, as if he had just been trying to convince her that he was an alien prince from another.... no, perhaps that wasn't an accurate comparison.  
  
Eventually, she sighed, as if giving in to something Loki didn't quite remember asking from her.  
She squatted in front of Loki, who was still sitting awkwardly on the floor.  
Her expression changed from cool to desperate before Loki could blink.  
  
"I don't know how she is!" she shouted, her eyes wide and brows knit together. "I've no idea! I'm no fucking doctor!"  
  
Loki almost backed away at her raising her voice, he probably would have if it wasn't for the wall behind him, but he did his best to forcibly calm his nerves and listen to her like he would have in the past, when he was still a god. If with more interest, this time.  
  
"She's not waking up..." Darcy whispered, apparently   
talking to herself. "I don't know what to do. I've rewrapped her bandages, and she's not bleeding as much anymore, but she's still unconscious. I need to take her to a hospital..." Looking up at Loki, she continued: "She might die if I don't."  
  
"She might also die horribly if other humans were to find out about me," Loki said. He was surprised at his own boldness.  
  
Well, that was partly a lie. She wouldn't die if S.H.I.E.L.D. found out, though it's true that it'd become unpleasant if they interrogated her.  
But Loki knew somebody who would undoubtedly suffer and eventually die horribly in their hands; himself.  
But as much as he didn't want to risk it, if things were too bad, he knew he'd have to. He was the reason Jane couldn't go to the hospital in the first place, and who knows what Thor's reaction would be if his mortal lady died because of Loki.  
He didn't want to think about it.  
  
"Lady Darcy, I have a request," Loki ventured. Darcy stared at him blankly, so for the lack of disapproval, he continued. "Please let me go to my mistress' side. I would like to have a look myself. If her life is in immediate danger, you will have to take her to a healer."  
  
Darcy bit her lip.  
"Fine. We'll do that," she decided. "But if you do any strange movies, I will taser you as many times as I have to."  
"You must really like that device," Loki observed. "I would appreciate it if you didn't do anything extreme for the time being, until we can determine my mistress' condition."  
Darcy shrugged and got up, grabbing the door handle. "No promises." She smirked. "But for what it's worth, I assure you that I'll try to think carefully before I act."  
  
Loki couldn't help a mischievous smile as he followed behind the woman, muttering a polite "thank you" and bowing his head slightly.  
With one last longing look at his meal, still waiting for him on the cabinet, he closed the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Important!]
> 
> I would like to make a change to this fic's storyline, and make Loki's torture on Asgard have lasted not twenty days, but six months or so. I think it actually makes a lot more sense, given his current state!
> 
> I'll edit the previous chapters according to this change sometime in the future, but I wanted to let you guys know first. Future chapters will be written according to this change as well.
> 
>  
> 
> Anyways, thank you for reading! If you have time, please do leave a comment and let me know your thoughts! <3


End file.
